A Regular Year at TUFF
by Villain84
Summary: After getting fired from the park, Mordecai and Rigby become T.U.F.F. agents. What new challenges await them in this new career? Will they finally learn some responsibility and discipline? More detailed summery included inside.
1. Episode 1: Bitter Ends

**Summery: After getting fired from the park, Mordecai and Rigby become T.U.F.F agents. What new challenges await them in this new career? Will they finally learn some responsibility and discipline?**

**Rated T for language, graphic violence, and some alcohol. Will also feature characters from Ren & Stimpy, Dick Figures, Kung Fu Panda, Halo, Rango, Llamas with Hats, Horton Hears A Who, and more. Upcoming pairings include Mordecai x Margaret, Dudley x Kitty, and Rigby x OC. No lemons and not that much sexual content.**

**Note: The park that is the setting for Regular Show is part of Petropolis here. Actually, it's all a huge city with a name I'll determine later, and Petropolis is just a district of it, and the park is in another district.**

**This is my first crossover here. Enjoy!**

* * *

><p>Another hot, sweaty, summer day. The sun beat down mercilessly on the park. Though it was not so hot as to prevent the tourists and guests from playing, relaxing and enjoying their day, it was more than enough to make Mordecai and Rigby hate their lives.<p>

There had been a huge party the previous evening, and Benson had assigned them to pick up all the trash that had been left around. There were wrappers, empty soda and beer cans, half-eaten food, bags of chips, and all sorts of litter dispersed all over the place. It would take hours for two slackers to pick it all up.

"Man, does this uber-blow or what?" Rigby shouted at Mordecai. Beads of sweat trickled down his face as he stabbed a beer can with his stick and stuck it into his trash bag.

"Dude, save your energy." His best friend snapped back. His face was just as sweaty as Rigby's. "We've only been out here an hour, and we're going to be out here for a long time today, and we need to keep our cool if we're going to get anything done."

"KEEP OUR COOL! How can we keep our cool in this heat?"

"Well, I'm not exactly enjoying the heat either!"

"Dude, I got a spear here! Don't think I'm afraid to use it!" Rigby dropped his bag and raised his stick, its sharp pointed tip pointed at Mordecai.

"Woah! Dude, calm down!" Mordecai raised his arms in defense, suddenly getting nervous.

Rigby suddenly came to his senses. He was about to stab the blue jay who had been his best friend for as long as he could remember. And for what? Just for a slight agitation and complaints about the heat? They have had worse reasons to argue in the past.

"I'm sorry dude." Rigby said calmy as he lowered his stick, grabbed up his bag again, and started picking up trash again.

"It's cool dude." Mordecai smiled.

"Cool?"

"Okay, bad choice of words I guess." Mordecai giggled. Both friends got a small laugh out of that.

"You know, I thought you liked it when we pick up trash." Mordecai said after a while. "You find all sorts of cool knick-knacks. What's that saying you go by? One man's junk is another man's pleasure?"

"Well, yeah," Rigby replied, "but it's just SO HOT OUT today. And it's not all just random junk we're picking up like normal. It's just the trash after of a party. There's nothing here but beer cans and leftover food, unless you want to eat the leftovers!" Tauntingly, he stabbed a half-eaten sandwich and shook it up at Mordecai.

"Eww! No freaken' thanks dude!" Mordecai snapped.

Still giggling, Rigby slipped the sandwich into his garbage bag. "The other thing is like you said." he became serious again. "There's a ton of trash out here. We're going to be out here pretty much all day." The boys looked all over the park and were reminded of the big job they still had to do.

"Yeah, it would be nice if we had a few more guys to help us out." Mordecai moped in agreement. "But there's really no point in standing around complaining." He started to get back to picking up the trash.

"And to make things worse, it's suppose to rain later on today." Rigby whined.

"Well then, lets try to finish up before that happens. And if not, a little water will cool us down, won't it?" Suddenly, Mordecai's stick stopped and vibrated in his hand. He had struck something heavy and metal. "Woah! What the heck was that?"

Mordecai and Rigby crounched down near the metal object. It was half-buried into the ground. The top bit that was showing was round, smooth on top, and a brillaintly gleaming gold. Surprisingly, it was not rusted at all. It also seemed to have a red brush of some sort sticking up from the top.

"What's with the brush?" Rigby asked.

"I don't know, dude." Mordecai replied as he reached for it. "Here, help me pull it out."

Both of them gripped the object, their ams tangled up, and started pulling straight up in unison. The earth held on pretty tight though. The object must have been stuck in there for decades, perhaps centuries. Slowly though, the duo felt the object coming free of the earth, inch by inch, and they kept pulling.

At last, the object came free, and Mordecai lifted it up, as Rigby fell back. It was a golden gladiator helmet. Where the dirt had not corroded and covered the metal, it gleamed in the sunlight. Both boys stared at in in awe for a moment.

"That's a pretty-looking helmet!" Rigby said quietly. And then suddenly, an idea struck him. "Oo! I got it!" He exclaimed. "Let's go sell it to the museum!"

"That, is _sooo_ a good idea!" Mordecai tuned in.

"YEEEEAAHH!" The partners high fived quick.

"But we kind of have to finish the job here." Mordecai's excitement died down.

"Screw the job!" Rigby snarled. "Let's make some cash!" And before Mordecai could say another word, Rigby snatched the helmet out of his hands. He was about to turn around and head towards the park entrance when suddenly, his eye was caught by some writing on the side of the helmet.

"Dude! We're not selling it now! Let's just finish up here, then we can sell it!" Mordecai yelled back. Clearly the heat was getting to him.

"Hold on, there's something written here." Rigby said calmly. He squinted and began to read the inscription.

_'With this upon your head, recite our cry,_

_And your brothers will come to stand you by.'_

"What?" Mordecai asked. plainly weirded out by the saying, as Rigby was.

"I have no idea what it means."

"Well, it sounds like you're suppose to say something, and then some guys will come to help you or something."

_Some guys will come to help you._ Suddenly, in Rigby's mind sparked another brilliant idea. "Dude! That's it!"

"What's it?"

"We just have to call these guys here, and they'll help us clean up the mess here, and we'll be done that much sooner!"

Mordecai looked at his friend with a puzzled look. Rigby seemed completely delusional. "Dude, it's an ancient helmet. You really think putting it on and saying some words will call a bunch of warriors?"

"Well, with all the crazy stuff that happens around here, it's worth a shot, don't you think?" Clearly, Rigby's spirits were not down, he was more excited than ever.

"Hm. Point taken." Mordecai replied. Rigby lifted the helmet over his head to put it on. "But dude, even if this does work, how can you possibly know the words to the cry?"

The helmet resting on his head, Rigby took a deep breath and shouted "THIS IS SPARTA!" and with that, suddenly, a dark storm cloud started swirling around the park, directly over the area where Mordecai and Rigby stood. A strong, yellow light beamed down from the eye of the storm, and right around the ground within a radius of at least five yards with Rigby at the center. As the light shone on the ground, suddenly, a skeleton's hand reached up from the earth, and clawed its way up. Following the claw was a skeleton warrior, dressed in a full asortment of armor, and a helmet much like Rigby's. And then another skeleton warrior rose from the earth as well, and then another, and another.

Until finally, at least fifty skeleton warriors, each wearing armor, and armed with swords, shields, spears, daggers and other medieval weapon under the sun, had risen. Once they had all risen, the ray of light receeded back into the storm clouds.

The warriors stood in around the duo for a moment, doing nothing, simply breathing heavily and standing around jauntingly, as though they were fatigued. The duo just stood silently, both because they were freaked out and because they were waiting for something to happen.

When nothing did for about a minute, Mordecai whispered to Rigby. "How did you know those were the right words?"

"Remember when we saw _300_? And how that one moment became an internet meme?"

"Oh, right. He." Mordecai held in a slight chuckle, remembering some of the funny videos on youtube he and Rigby had seen about that phrase. But then he turned his attention back to the skeletons.

"Uh, hey!" Rigby announced, loud so they could all hear him. "So, I've called you all here to, um... pick up trash! So come on... yeah! Who's with me?" He raised his stick up in the air.

The skeletons all seemed to acknowledge this, as they all raised their weapons, and started chanting "Pick up trash! Pick up trash!" They ran around the section of the park, skewering trash on their sharp weapons, or picking it up in their hands, and carrying it over to trash cans.

Rigby and Mordecai stared awkwardly at the skeletons doing their job for a moment, than they shot each other a look, then grinned at each other. Everything was working.

"Wow!" Rigby exclaimed. "I can't believe this is working. Looks like every thing's going to work out just fine."

"Hmph!" Mordecai murmured in satisfaction.

But Rigby spoke too soon. Suddenly, there was a loud bang. The duo turned around to face the source of the bang. Once soldier had kicked a trash can with brutal strenght, sending it hurtling across the trail and scattering trash everywhere again.

"Hey! What the heck are you doing!" Mordecai snapped at it, but it did not seem to listen. It continued on its new reign of destruction, and started tearing at some of the garbage bags with its sword.

Another one started going crazy and started chopping down the trees with its axe.

"Dude! Stop!" The duo shouted in unison, running over to him. But their attention was drawn from the trees to a nearby playground, which another warrior was attacking, tearing apart the monkey bars, and scaring away the children that were playing on them.

Overall, the warriors were going crazy now, tearing the whole place apart. Some started running off into the park to continue their spree.

"Dude, Benson is going to kill us when he sees this!" Mordecai whined.

"Yeah, no kidding." Rigby stuttered. "So what do we do?"

"I don't know."

A scream broke their thoughts, and the boys turned to face a little girl being chased by a warrior swinging a hammer.

"Come on! We gotta save her!" Mordecai started running over to the skeleton, and Rigby got on all fours and followed. They tackled the warrior just before he swung a home-hitting blow on the girl, and she managed to get away.

The boys continued to lay on the skeleton for a moment, when suddenly, they heard a snapping sound. Suddenly, the skeleton's body, bones and armor, crumbled to dark red vapor and dust, and floated away into the air. They boys looked down and saw that there was a rock under them.

"He must have snapped his back bone on that rock." Mordecai pointed out.

"Looks like it."

They got up and looked around again. Fires were starting to brew now in the grass. The warriors were still going berserk and terrorizing the guests. The park was in absolute chaos. Mordecai and Rigby ran along the path, trying to figure out what to do. They saw Pops being chased by one warrior, and Muschle Man and Skipps were fighting some more, back to back.

Mordecai and Rigby stopped for this. Skipps punched one warrior's head off with one swift punch. As its head rolled over the ground, its body vaporized, and so did its head after a minute.

Muscle Man was sword fighting one warrior with one sword he must have gotten from another warrior. "Eat my blade, bozo!" He shouted as he parried his opponent's blows.

Suddenly, another cry was heard farther on the grass. Mordecai and Rigby looked to see Mr. Maellard, the true owner of the park, being chased by another warrior.

"Go save Mr. Maellard!" Skipps barked at the boys.

"Right!" They shouted in unison as they ran over to him. On the way, Mordecai picked up a small rock. Suddenly, Mr. Maellard tripped over a small bit of grass, and fell face first on the ground. Rigby dashed forward on all fours, just as the warrrior was raising his sword to strike Mr. Maellard. Maellard screamed in terror, raising his hands to protect himself.

The sword fell, but landed with a clang! It hit Rigby's helmet, scratching it a little, causing a rattling in Rigby's head. Just then, Mordecai leaped up, and still holding his rock, punched the skeleton in the jaw. The lower jawbone came loose, and was sent flying over the grass. The warrior crumbled to red vapor as it did so.

Both boys took a breather after that fight, but they barely had a second before Maellard shouted "WHAT THE DEVIL IS GOING ON HERE!"

"We're sorry, sir." Mordecai stuttered. "We found this helmet, and we thought it we could call some guys to help with our job."

"You mean _you_ caused this?" Maellard shouted again. "How did you call these monsters that are destroying my park?"

"I just put on this helmet here." Rigby said. "We shouted 'this is sparta' and they were summoned somehow."

Maellard glared at them for a moment. "Well then, why don't you take the helmet off?"

Mordecai and Rigby's eyes widened as they facepalmed themselves. _Why didn't we think of that sooner?_ They both thought.

Rigby reached up and shoved the helmet off of his head, the violently threw it on the ground.

As he did, the skeleton warriors all seemed to look up from whatever they were doing, and raised their weapons toward the sky.

"Our work is done. Our work is done." They all chanted. The chant continued as they all crumbled back into red vapor. The clouds of vapor rose up and flew back up into the cloud from which the light came. Once it seemed all the vapor clouds have returned, the dark clouds must have drifted away, for the sky seemed to lighten up slightly. It would have lightened up more, likely, but the rain clouds that have been forecast must be almost upon them.

The skeletons were gone, but the damage they did was still traced everywhere. Fires were still burning, litter lay scrambled everywhere, trees cut down, overall, the park was a mess. Luckily, however, nobody was hurt. Skipps, Pops, Muscle Man, and High Five Ghost all came up and glared angrily at Mordecai and Rigby, and so did Mr. Maellard.

"MORDECAI! RIGBY!" Screamed an angry, all too familiar voice. A golf cart zoomed up and furious speed right next to the group, and out stomped Benson, his gumball beard red as a tomato. A death glare locked on Mordecai and Rigby, who were on the verge of wetting their pants now, if they wore pants that is.

"WHAT HAVE YOU DONE _THIS_ TIME!"

Mordecai tried to choke up an explanation "Woah, Benson, we're really sorry. We-"

"NO! You know what? I'm sick of your excuses!"

Rigby intercepted, and tried to apologize as well. "Benson, calm down, we'll get to work right now and clean up and fix everything."

"NO! You won't clean it up! You won't fix anything! You guys do nothing around here! All you do is slack off, you never get your jobs done, and then you end up causing big disasters like this! You guys are nothing but trouble! A waste of time, energy, space, and money! Well, guess what, I can't take it anymore! YOU TWO ARE BOTH FIRED!"

Right at that last word, as if on que, lightning flashed, and thunder clapped, and rain started coming down lightly. Mordecai and Rigby just stared, jaws dropped at the furious Benson for a moment. He just stood there glaring, letting his words sink in.

They could not believe Benson had just said that. It was true, they had screwed up many times in their time working as groundskeepers at the park. They had caused big disasters, from sending Skipps to the moon, to unleashing a rampaging Satan head from a video game, to letting a bunch of partying unicorns trash their house. And after each mess-up, Benson had always allowed them to try again. They had always had more chances to make things right. Mordecai and Rigby figured that they took those second chances for granted, that they would never actually get fired.

But it just happened. Benson had made it crystal clear. It was all over. They were fired. Out. Terminated.

They turned back towards the rest of the staff, hoping they would say something. But they all seemed to be in agreement with Benson.

"You guys have gone too far this time." Said Skipps, shaking his head.

"This is not dandy." Pops sulked.

"Ha Ha! You losers got fired!" Muscle Man cackled and pointed. High Five Ghost just floated next to him and frowned at the guys.

"For a long time now, I've been blaming Beenson for _your_ mishaps." Mr. Maellern said stoutly. "But now I know all the disasters of the park are because of you two. You are like a wart, boys. A wart that hurts when our body walks. And you must be removed."

Seeing that everyone has lost their faith in them, Mordecai and Rigby's hearts sank even further. Looking at the ground. Mordecai and Rigby turned to Benson's direction.

Though he was still obviously furious, he was starting to calm down now, so he spoke to them in a softer tone of voice. "I'll give you ten minutes to pack up your things from the house, and get out. Go."

Slowly, Mordecai and Rigby walked passed Benson and toward the house. As they walked through the ruined park, the rain started to come down harder, shrinking the fires and washing away some of the dirt.

* * *

><p>Meanwhile, in the neighboring district of the city, where the rain was still coming down hard, all of the available TUFF agents, around fifty-ish, all crowded around in a large field in the outskirts of the district that was the official TUFF cemetery. All agents were dressed in black formal clothing.<p>

Dudley Puppy was there in a black tuxedo he rented, standing along side his partner, Kitty Katswell, in a black gown she wore only for these occasions. Keswick was there in a black lab coat as well. Also there was Agents Hammy Nuts, Felica Jumbo, Sally Mander, Timmy Rodentski, Ray the Scarecrow, Tammy the Bunny, and Robert Quacksworth.

**(Author's Note: All of them are canon, except Agent Quacksworth. You can see all of them on the TUFF Puppy wiki.)**

Also there was Agent RJ Maskers, a raccoon and TUFF's forensics expert, in between his loyal intern, Percy Pica, and the medical and psychology specialist, Dr. Soren Hornbeak, a horned owl. They all stood silently for a minute. At the last TUFF funeral, which was Percy's first one, Percy had talked a lot and asked a lot of questions. This time however, he knew better after RJ had scolded him. He, like everyone else, kept quiet.

Everyone had crowded around two grave stones, the coffins still unburied, and open. In one mahogany coffin was a turtle in his 30s, while the other held a sheep who was not much younger. Both had their arms folded, were wrapped comfortably in creme colored blankets, their eyes closed peacefully.

At last, the Chief Herbert Dumbrowski, the fearless flea who ran TUFF, hopped up onto an mahogany podium, and cleared his throat for a camera to pop out of it and look him over for his close-up on the TV screen, and he began his eulogy speech. As his screen buzzed to life, all the present agents removed any hats they had, and became silent to pay their respects. A few sniffled or held back a tear. One or two had tears streaming down their faces.

"Thank you, fellow TUFF agents, for coming today. Today, we give our thanks, our honor, and our final farewells to our dear allies, Agent Verne Shellington, and Agent Ramona Fleece. These agents have fought hard for our country, and were recently killed in action while foiling DOOM's latest scheme."

While the chief continued his speech, some agents felt rage flare up in their hearts as they remembered how Snaptrap and his gang shot them dead. But they did not show it.

"...and as we fight for our country, we will remember their sacrifice and make sure it does not go down in vain. We will carry their memory on our shoulders, and fight in their memory. Farewell, Agents Fleece and Shellington."

And with that, the Chief stood in a firm salute, his eyes closed, as all the other TUFF agents did the same. A few troopers came up to the coffins and slowly closed them, and then draped the american flag over each. After doing so, another platoon of troopers took their rifles, and fired off into the air. The shots echoed all throughout the cemetery.

A cluster of violinists played a sad, goodbye song as each agent lined up and dropped flowers into the graves as the caskets were being lowered into them. Once all was said and done, there was a moment of silence, a moment of prayers and final goodbyes towards the departed agents.

After the moment of silence, the agents turned and silently left the cemetary, about to return to TUFF to continue their jobs.

Keswick and the Chief stayed behind for another moment. Not because they were still greatly mourning the loss of the operatives, but to talk about what must happen next. In light of what had just happened, they spoke softly.

"Of course you know what this means, right Keswick?"

"That now we have job openings for agents to replace Fleece and Sh-Sh-Shellington?"

"Yep."

"I'll post it on the TUFF website immediately." Keswick took out his smart phone to do the work. "And we'll s-s-start interviews tomorrow."

As they started walking out the cemetery gates after the other agents, the Chief started talking again. "I just hope whatever new agents we get tomorrow, they will be just terrific agents. The world of TUFF is a dangerous world Keswick. We need the finest, smartest, strongest, fastest clay to work with."

"Well Chief, I'm sure whomever we get, they will be destined for greatness here at TUFF."

**Author's Note: Well, I think we all know what happens next (Seriously, it is kind of predictable, isn't it). I'm expecting to make this a long on-going series. It may be a while before I can update this though, since I'm a bit backed up on projects right now.**

**And thank you anyone who has read, subscribed, favored, and especially reviewed this story. It really means a lot to me. Thank you.**


	2. Episode 2: Job Openings

The rain continued to poor outside under the dark, drizzly sky. It had extinguished most of the fires by now. Mordecai and Rigby listened to it pounding against the window and ceiling as they gathered their things together. They each had a back pack to carry their stuff in. Most of their stuff was just a few pairs of clothes, that they wore for emergencies and situations that required them, some pens, a few toys and knick-knacks, some snacks they were saving, their wallets, an address book, a few posters, the pieces of Rigby's trampoline bed, their toothbrushes, toothpaste, deodorant, and razors, and the spartan helmet.

"I can't believe Benson actually fired us." Rigby said at last in a quiet, questioning tone, the kind of tone one speaks in at a funeral, though not on the verge of tears. It was not that sad of a moment for them. Neither of them have spoken since Benson sent them up to pack up.

"Yeah." Mordecai replied in just as gloomy a tone. "I guess he's said he'd fire us so many times, they just started feeling like empty threats at one point. We never thought he'd actually do it, you know?"

"Yeah. Hey, how long have we been working here now?"

"I'd say its been about... five months. I mean we started in spring, right? And now its in early august, right?"

"Wow, I didn't think it was that short a time."

"Well, I guess that's what happens when you lose a job you get attached to. You look back on all the time you've spent doing it, and wonder if you've accomplished anything, you know?"

"And, what have we accomplished?"

"Nothing." Mordecai's eyes and heart sank further to the floor.

At last, they stood up, both finished their packing, and headed for the door. Before leaving, they both turned around to give their room one last look over. It was completely empty now, save for the cabinet that they kept their stuff in, and Mordecai's bed. They remembered the first day they came to the park, the day before they started working, when Pops had shown them first the nicely kept house, and then their room here. Back then, the room was completely untouched and clean for them. They had done a lot of fun and stupid things in this room, just as they had done in the rest of the park pretty much. They also remembered from their first day how they were concerned with not causing any big problems and screwing things up for themselves, and then they ended up playing a dangerous game of Rock, Paper, Scissors that almost got them killed for a chair that they did not even want that much.

Both boys let out a sigh before heading downstairs. They stopped by the living room to grab a few of their video games that they had bought themselves. The system itself was park property, so they unfortunately could not take it. A shame, too. They loved all the games they had played there. Again, they had some fond memories in this room, and with these video games.

At last, they came out the door, and Benson was waiting for them in his golf cart. His face showed no signs of sympathy, or even of disliking or annoyance. He was giving them a look that displayed indifference. The rest of the gang was there as well. Skips had his usual look on his face that either expressed anger or indifference, though he looked slightly more disappointed than usual. Pops was holding his hat down over his chest, a sad gaze locked on Mordecai and Rigby. Muscle Man was chuckling to himself silently. Mr. Maellard simply frowned and shook his head. High Five Ghost also looked sad to see the boys off.

Slowly, Mordecai and Rigby marched down the porch, not very much bothered by the irritating, chilling pokes from the rain. They hopped into the back seats of the golf cart. Benson started the engine and began to drive off. The boys looked behind them, and watched as their friends shrank on the road behind them as they drove away. They all waved goodbye after them. Pops was on the verge of tears to see his dear friends leave.

The whole ride to the gate, no one said a word. Mordecai and Rigby knew this was no time to try to make friendly conversation with Benson.

At last, they arrived at the front gate to the park. Mordecai and Rigby got out of their seats, and slowly trotted toward the gate. However, when they reached the tip of the cart, Benson stopped them.

"Wait, guys." He said. "I have your final paychecks here." He held out two blue rectangular papers to them, which Mordecai took, and handed one to Rigby.

"Thanks, Benson." Mordecai said gratefully.

"Now, I don't want to see you guys around here ever again on business terms." Benson continued sternly.

"Can we still come here sometime as regular guests?" Rigby asked.

Benson thought for a second. "How about you guys just stay away from the park for the rest of the month. You can come in after that."

"Okay. Thanks."

"Good luck out there guys." And with that, Benson put the cart in reverse, and after turning around, he headed back along the path into the park.

Mordecai and Rigby almost immediatly started to shiver from the light, quick, and numerous pokes from the rain.

"We're going to stick together through this, right?" Rigby asked Mordecai as they slowly walked out of the park.

"Oh, yeah sure. Absolutely." Mordecai replied, still depressed. "We've been best pals since we decided not to go to college, -I mean after I dropped out and you didn't go at all. We're bros, partners! We got to stick together through stuff like this!"

"That's right. Besides. We got into this together, and now we're going to stay in it together!" Rigby held up his fist to his pal. Mordecai pumped it with his. His punches were still _way_ stronger than Rigby's. "So, now what?"

"Let's head on over to the museum now and cash in that helmet."

"Yeah. Let's do that." And the duo headed into the city towards the museum.

* * *

><p>"Aw! Are you freaking kidding me?" Mordecai nearly exploded. Same thing with Rigby. It just so happened that the museum was closed for the day.<p>

"Come on!" Rigby impulsively kicked the locked revolving door of the museum, hurting his foot. He hopped around holding his foot whispering "Ow, Ow, Ow." For a few seconds. After that, they duo's anger and frustration quickly turned to despair.

What were they to do now? They had no where to stay, no food, and only about $50 to live off of. They were unemployed, unwanted, and unloved. The rain continued to pour, soaking and jabbing at them like needles. They sat down on the edge of the sidewalk to plan out their next move.

"Well, this is by far one of the worst days of my life." Rigby said at last glumly.

"Mine too." Mordecai pouted. "I loved working at that park. Everyone there was cool, and cool, fun things happened every day."

"Yeah. Now what are we going to do? Where are we going to work now?"

"...I don't know," Mordecai answered after a pause, "but I think the first thing we need to figure out is where we're going to stay tonight." Then suddenly, an lightbulb went off in his head to answer that question. "Hey, I know. Why don't we head on up to the other side of town where your brother, Don is, and ask if we can spend the night as his place?"

"Do we have to?" Rigby whined.

"Come on, man. I thought you and Don made up now and you don't get jealous of him that much anymore."

"We did. It's just that it's all the way on the other side of town. I don't want to walk all the way there in the rain!"

"Well, we don't have a better idea." Mordecai stood up with his back pack. "Come on dude. The sooner we get there, the sooner we can dry off."

With a few grunts, Rigby stood up and followed Mordecai. It was true. Don's house, which was just a few blocks away from the park, was a bit of a walk from where they were. They had already walked for about an hour in the rain to get to the museum, only to find it closed.

The city was seemed completely deserted. Mordecai and Rigby seemed to be the only people walking through the streets that dark, drizzly afternoon. There were not even any cars passing by to brighten the mood with their noises and lights. Most people were probably in their warm, dry homes, hanging out with friends and family, or just relaxing and enjoying the rain from indoors like some people liked to do. A few house lights could be seen through the window, but other than Mordecai and Rigby, those seemed to be the only signs of life. They continued to walk down the lonely sidewalk for just a few more minutes, when they finally ran into familiar robin at a pedestrian crossing.

"Hey Margaret." Mordecai exclaimed as he and Rigby approached her. He was slightly delighted to see his long-time crush, though still down about how the rest of this nasty day was going.

"Mordecai? Rigby? Hey guys." She replied cheerfully. She wore a grey hooded sweatshirt, though dark grey now because of the rain soaking it, and an equally soaked pair of short jeans. "What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be at the park? You guys aren't playing hooky again, are you?" She giggled at that last statement.

"Well, no we're not playing hooky." Mordecai stuttered. "We, umm... You see, we..."

"We got fired." Rigby interjected briefly. Mordecai still had a little trouble talking to Margaret, and here he did not really want her to know they got fired. But Rigby did not care.

"What?" Margaret's mouth dropped. "That sucks! I can't believe it. I didn't think you guys would ever get fired from there."

"Join the club, babe." Rigby said in a deadpan tone.

"Well, what are you guys going to do now?"

"We're going to have to look for a new job somewhere." Mordecai replied.

"Well, do you have a place to stay?"

"Well, we were going up to Rigby's brother's house and ask if we could spend the night there, then start a job hunt tomorrow."

"But Rigby, doesn't your brother live on the other side of town?"

"Yep." Rigby answered.

"Well, my apartment is just about another block away. You guys wanna come over and spend the night with me."

"Oh, thanks Margaret." Mordecai answered nervously. "That's okay, I'm sure Don won't mind having us."

"Wow, thanks Margaret." Rigby answered cheerfully, his attitude finally starting to lighten up. "We'd love to spend the night at your place."

"Alright. Cool. Come on." Margaret smiled and hurried across the walkway. Mordecai and Rigby followed just a short distance behind her.

"What is up with you man?" Mordecai whispered angrily to Rigby. "Why are you putting us up to this?"

"Come on dude! This way we don't have to walk the whole way over to Don's." And then a grin crept across Rigby's face. "Besides. The girl of your dreams is coming to help you after you got fired! She's offering for you to stay at your place. You don't say 'no' to that!"

"Oh, yeah. Good point." Mordecai chuckled when they were across the street. As they walked up next to Margaret, he turned his attention to her.

"So, what are you doing out here on this side of town today?"

"Well, I got a day off, so I decided why not come over and maybe check out the museum?"

"Oh, well, not a good day to got there. It's closed. We were just there."

"What? Damn it! I haven't been there in a while and I hear they've got a lot of cool new exhibits there."

"Well, good thing you ran into us or you would have gone the whole way for nothing." Rigby chuckled, and getting Margaret to do the same.

* * *

><p>Soon, the three were in Margaret's warm, dry apartment. It was cozy little place with a green carpet floor and white plaster walls. In one corner of the room there was creme colored couch and armchair with cushions at the left of the entrance, facing a small TV up against the wall. At the right was a counter that led into the kitchen. At the far right, after the kitchen, was a door that led into Margaret's bedroom, and she said that the bathroom was just next door to that. Mordecai felt a little awkward at the thought of having to go through Margaret's bedroom to get to the bathroom. The lights in the bedroom were out, so they could not see inside.<p>

"Again, thanks for staying letting us crash here, Margaret," Mordecai said awkwardly as they walked into the main room.

"Yeah. Nice place you got here too." Rigby followed up.

"No problem guys. I know you'd do the same for me if I got fired." Margeret replied as she hung up her sweatshirt on a coat rack, revealing a beige tank T-shirt underneath.

"Of course we would." said Mordecai.

"You guys want some towels?"

"Sure. Thanks."

Mordecai and Rigby stood at the entrance so as not to drip everywhere. Margaret continued talking as she walked into the bathroom to grab some towels. "Okay, so you guys can stay as long as you need to until you're all set up with some new jobs. Mordecai, you can sleep on the couch there. Rigby, you can have the armchair." She finally came out with two white bath towels and tossed them to Mordecai, which he caught and passed one to Rigby.

"I was going to order Chinese for dinner. You guys okay with that?"

"Oh, yeah. Sure. We love Chinese." Mordecai replied.

"Hm, Hm." Rigby nodded.

"Alright. Cool." Margaret strode on over to the counter and snatched the phone out of its holder there and started dialing the numbers for the Chinese restaurant.

As she did so, the boys finished drying off, and plopped down on the couch. Rigby wanted to turn the TV on, but Mordecai shook his head at him as he reached for the remote. He was trying not to do anything that Margaret might interpret as rude. Rigby thought at first he was just being overly cautious, but then he decided to respect his friend, so he sat down, arms crossed, bored.

"Okay, so that takes care of where we're going to stay," He muttered. "So, now we should probably start thinking about where we're going to work."

"You don't want to wait until tomorrow to do that?" Mordecai raised an eyebrow, surprised. He did not expect Rigby to be so anxious about getting a new job.

"Well, I know you want to try to get a new job so Margaret doesn't think your a lazy slacker." Rigby smirked and elbowed Mordecai in the arm.

"Yeah, that's true." Mordecai rolled his eyes. "We'll look at the paper or on the computer later." He perked up. "I'm sure we'll find something. There's bound to be something we can do. They might need frycooks, or janitors, or taxi drivers, bellhops, waiters, movie theatre workers, moving van guys, I'm sure we'll find something along those lines."

"Dude, why are you picking out all the lame jobs that only suckers go for?" Rigby pouted, "Come on! We can do better than that. Let's find an exciting job that pays well! Like astronauts, or doctors, or video game designers, or-or, cops! You know?"

"Rigby, look at us." Mordecai moaned. "Neither of us went to college, never went on any internships. Before groundskeepers, you didn't have a job, and I worked as a cashier at a fried chicken joint-"

"You know, I never thought about it, but that's kind of ironic, 'cause your a blue jay."

"-And forget about training and school," Mordecai continued, "no matter what job we get, we probably won't take it that seriously, and get fired within the first week." And then he started to lower his voice, as his next thought crossed his mind. "Benson had good reason to fire us. Let's face it Rigby, we're losers. We'll be lucky if we find a job within that range I just listed that we can stick with. No one is going to want to hire us to do big things." His eyes turned down to the floor.

"Mordecai! That's not true!" Rigby snapped. "Look at me!" Mordecai raised his eyes to Rigby. "You are not a loser! And neither am I! Just look at what we've accomplished while we were at the park. We saved the park from being obliterated by a fire-breathing satan head, we saved the universe from being unraveled by a space-time vortex, saved the park from being audited with Don, we beat a giant snow monster, and a demonic werewolf version of me, and a zombie army, and saved the inhabitants of viral videos from being trapped forever in a computer realm! The list of our accomplishments goes on and on! Now, you look me in the eye again and tell me that couple of losers could do all those things!"

"Rigby, you're forgetting that we caused most of those disasters, and if Benson, Pops, Skips, and admittingly Muscle Man and High Five, hadn't been there to bail us out, we probably wouldn't have been beat all those forces."

For second, Rigby stared at his pal, his eyes wide, Mordecai's droopy with disappointment. Mordecai was right about that point he just made. In the kitchen, they could hear Margaret talking on the phone, ordering their Chinese.

"So, you're just going to give up on us?" Rigby asked finally, breaking the silence. "You really don't think we can get decent jobs?"

Mordecai did not answer. He did not have to. He had made his point. He really did not think he and Rigby could find a better job. But suddenly, an idea struck him.

"Wait a minute," He exclaimed, "Doesn't your cousin work at that U.S. government secret agency?"

"Who? You mean RJ? He's the forensic specialist at TUFF," and in a dramtic, army-mimicing voice, he said "the Turbo, Undercover, Fighting Force!"

"Well, you want a cool job, why don't you give him a call? Maybe he can try to set us up with some jobs at TUFF."

"That's a great idea, dude!" Rigby exclaimed.

"YYEEEAH!" Mordecai raised his hand, Rigby high-fived him.

"Ooooooohhhhhhh!" They screamed at each other, the way they did whenever they got excited about something together.

And then, as if on cue, Margaret came up to them, off the phone. "Okay," She said, "I just ordered it. It's going to be here in about ten minutes."

"Alright. Cool. Thanks." Mordecai smiled back.

"Hey, Margaret, can I have the phone?" Rigby held out his hand for the phone.

Margaret handed him the phone. He he started dialing the number.

* * *

><p>Meanwhile, at the TUFF autopsy lab, Professor RJ Maskers stood haunched over a gruesomely disfigured corpse. He was doing a little overtime tonight to try and finish this one case he was dealing with. He often stayed overtime to finish his work. It was good. He was paid more this way, but mostly, he just wanted to do his share of work at TUFF. He was using a pair of tongs to lift up some flesh and photograph the damage done by a bullet wound. There was a few cameras held on a post at the edge of the table. They were all focused on different parts of the body, some more magnified than others.<p>

Suddenly, the metal door, the only one into and out of the white-tiled room, slowly opened, and in walked Percy Pica, RJ's little intern. "Your tea, Sir." He stated, carrying a large coffee mug in his left hand.

"Thanks Percy." RJ said without looking up. "Leave it on the counter there."

Percy did as he was told. He placed the cup on the counter near the door. "Say, sir." Percy said. "If you don't mind me asking, do you miss agents Fleece and Shellington?"

RJ set his tongs on the at his side for a moment, and turned to his intern. "Well, I never really knew either of them too well. Verne and I hung out sometimes, but rarely. It's always a sad thing when someone dies. It's equally sad, if not more so when a TUFF agent dies in the line of duty. It's a great honor to die serving your country."

He sighed to avoid the sadness he was bringing himself to. "Still, field agents come and go. Its a natural occurance to us lab boys. We stay here in the labs where its safe while the field agents face the real dangers out there. And that is why its important for us to do our job in here, to make sure that whatever our brave agents sacrifice is not in vein."

"Truer words have never been spoken, I'm sure sir." Percy replied.

RJ smiled. He was happy to have Percy for an intern. Percy, a seventeen-year-old pica, was short, about Keswick's size, had dark brown-grayish fur, and was often confused for a koala or mouse. He was a rather handsome boy, with no braces, glasses, acne, or piercings. He usually wore a green vest and some jean shorts that went to his knees. He was a junior in high school, going on his senior year, aiming to become a doctor, surgeon, nurse, or something in that area. Percy was very respectful to his superiors, and RJ had done his best to keep Percy busy.

"Hey, get a clean rag and wipe, will you?" RJ said at last, breaking into his own trail of thought.

"Okay." Percy grabbed up a clean paper towel from the role they had on the counter, and walked over to the tray, and started wiping up the dirty tools that RJ was not using, as RJ picked up the tongs again. If Percy was first starting, RJ would have said 'get a clean paper towel from the roll there and wipe the tools', but by now, they had done the drill many times, as they have done many other drills together, and now, most of RJ's commands were kept brief with fewer words, and Percy was able to carry them all out flawlessly. RJ was proud. He was thirty-seven, so he was also happy to know that he did not seem like a grumpy old man.

Suddenly, the jeopardy theme song started playing in the room. Both were startled at first at the silence being broken, but both of them knew the source.

"Percy, my phone." RJ said.

"Yep."

Percy put down the scalpel he was cleaning, and skipped on over to the counter. He dropped the used paper towel into the waste basket with one hand, and with the other, grabbed up RJ's smart phone from the counter. RJ tore the rubber glove off his right hand and Percy handed him his phone.

"Hello?" RJ said into the phone as he lifted it to his head.

"Hey RJ, how ya doing?" Rigby's voice replied.

"Oh, hey Rigby." RJ was happy to hear from his little cousin. "Everything's okay here. What's up?"

"Well, I kind of need a favor." Rigby started to sound more serious as he got to the point. "Mordecai and I got fired from the park, so do you think you can try to hook us up with some new jobs at TUFF?"

"Wow, I'm sorry to here that." RJ answered in an honest voice. "Well, actually, you called at a pretty good time. We just lost a couple of TUFF agents the line of duty just yesterday, and now their positions are open. We're going to be holding interviews tomorrow. I could check with the higher-ups to put your names up for consideration. Just give me a second."

"Alright cool, thanks." Rigby covered the speaker part. "He said he's going to check with the bosses," he whispered to Mordecai and Margaret.

"I'll be right back." RJ said to Percy. Still holding his phone, he walked for the door. Before leaving the room, he grabbed his tea cup, and took a sip as he walked through the hallways. Hot, green tea. One cup of sugar, just the way he liked it. It relaxed him as the warm, comforting liquid slipped down his throat, not that he was really stressed at the time or anything.

At last, he came to the Chief's office. He knocked on the door, and when the chief's gruff voice hollered "come in!", he let himself in. The cheif was sitting at his desk, with Keswick at the front. They must have been having a talk about something.

"Agent Maskers?" The chief exclaimed. "What is it?"

"I have a couple of applicants for the new open agent positions here." RJ announced.

"We already have app-app-app-applicants?" Keswick stuttered, "But I didn't post that on the website yet."

"Well, they didn't know. They were just looking for a new job." RJ replied. "Their names are Mordecai Feathers and Rigby Maskers."

"Maskers? Is the latter related to you, RJ?" the Chief asked.

"He's my little cousin."

Keswick made a note on his clipboard. "Okay then. I've put their names on the sign-up list. Tell them to come here for the interviews ta-ta-tomorrow morning at eleven."

"Okay. Thank you sir." RJ smiled.

"Dismissed." The Chief replied.

RJ headed out the office, and walked around the cubicles of the other TUFF agents. He lifted his phone to his head again to tell Rigby the good news.

"Rigby, you still there?"

"Yep. Still here." His excited cousin's voice replied.

"Alright. So we're starting interviews for new agents tomorrow at eleven. Be here by then, and DON'T be late.

Rigby felt his heart sore, but he held it in until this was over. "Alright. Thanks RJ. This is a big help to us."

"No problem, little cous'. Well, I gotta get back to work. I'll see you tomorrow. Good luck. And really, don't be late."

"Okay. See ya."

"Later." RJ hung up and continued on his way back to the lab.

* * *

><p>Rigby pushed the hang-up button on the phone.<p>

"So?" Mordecai demanded, "What did he say?"

Rigby glanced over to him and grinned. "Guess who's got an interview tomorrow!"

Mordecai's smile shot up even bigger than Rigby's grin. "Yeee-yaaaah!" He exclaimed. He jumped up from his seat, then grabbed his little buddy by the hips, and hugged him. Both were laughing and cheering.

"That's my little bro!" Modecai squeezed Rigby in one arm, and gave him a nougie with the other.

"I'm so happy for you guys!" Margaret exclaimed.

"You see Mordo," Rigby said finally as their laughter died down, and Mordecai put him down, "There's always a way out of ruts like this. There's nothing ever wrong with trying."

"Don't get your hopes all the way up, dude." Mordecai replied, still happy but more serious. "We're not hired yet. It depends not if we can pass the interview."

"Relax!" Rigby hissed, "How hard can that be?"

"I'm sure you guys will be fine." Margaret added. Just then, the doorbell rang. "Oh, that's gotta be the chinese." She walked over o answer the door.

The depressing state that Mordecai and Rigby were in a second ago now seemed completely drained out of their heads. Now their minds were full of hope, and sweet thoughts about how their new career, their new journey, would turn out.

**Author's Note: I finally got this done. Hope anyone who reads is willing to submit a review or subscribe. And thanks to anyone who already reviewed or subscribed. Thank you everyone.**

**Again, I'll be a bit busy with my other stories, but I'll definitely update when I can. Thank you.**


	3. Episode 3: The Interview

The morning sun rose over the massive city. A rooster on the roof of the apartment building cock-a-doodle-dooed to greet the day before suddenly exploding. The sunlight crept in through the window and onto the couch, blasting Mordecai's face with morning heat. He groaned and slowly rose up. And then suddenly, he remembered something, and his eyes widened.

He frantically over to the clock on the wall. _9:15_. He sighed in relief. He and Rigby still had time. _Wait, Rigby! _Mordecai looked over to the chair and saw Rigby still sleeping peacefully. He was curled up on the chair like a cat, with his blanket over him. He looked kind of cute like that.

Mordecai silently hopped out from his 'bed', and tiptoed over to the chair.

"Rigby, Rigby," He whispered, "come on dude, its time to wake up." He gently shook his buddy.

"Huh?" Rigby slowly came to, blinked, and then stood up, yawning and stretching. "Morning already?"

"Dude, we got our interviews today!"

"Oh, yeah!" They both still whispered so they would not disturb Margaret or her neighbors.

"Come on, let's get ready."

"Right."

Mordecai started heading to the bathroom, but then he remembered that to do so, he had to go through Margaret's room. He noticed that the door was open, and the lights were on, so Margaret must be up. He took a step closer to the room.

"You gonna see if she's dressing?" Rigby snickered.

"Shut up, dude!" Mordecai snapped.

"Hey, I'm just kidding."

Mordecai then saw just on the wall to the right of the bedroom door that there was another door. That must be the bathroom. He heard water running, so Margaret must have been showering.

He suddenly heard Rigby opening and closing some cupboards. Mordecai walked over to the kitchen, and saw him standing on the counter, going through an upper cupboard.

"What are you doing?" He hissed.

"I'm making us coffee," Rigby answered in a matter-of-fact voice, "you want some, don't you?"

"Dude, we can't just go through Margaret's stuff!"

"Quit being so cautious. She won't mind. You're just being extra careful not to _piss_ her off."

Mordecai was quiet for a second. He guessed that Margaret would not mind much. "Okay."

Rigby took down three white mugs from the cupboard, as well as three small paper cups, the kind you might expect to find creme in, only bigger.

"Hey look, she has one of those Keurig makers," Rigby stated, "Cool!"

Mordecai looked over to his left on the counter and saw the maker Rigby was talking about. He pushed the 'on' button on it. The water receiver lit blue, and the whole thing hummed to life, heating up.

"You guys making coffee?"

"Woah!" Mordecai spun around to face Margaret, all dressed in her baige waitress outfit.

"Oh, sorry," Margaret stuttered, "Didn't mean to startle you."

"No problem, it's cool," Mordecai blurted out. "Yeah, we were going to make coffee. Hope you don't mind, we went though your cupboards."

"Not at all," Margaret smiled, "Sorry I only have that one flavor, though."

"Oh, that's fine," Rigby replied, slapping one coffee pack into the maker, "All coffees are the same, right?"

"Not really," Said Margaret, "each one really has its own unique traits. This one is just my favorite. How about we toast up some bagels to go with it?" She walked passed Mordecai to the fridge.

"Sure. We love bagels," Mordecai replied.

"Cool."

Mordecai figured now that Margaret was out, he should probably get in the bathroom and freshen up. He a little uncomfortable leaving Rigby alone with Margaret, but he knew Rigby was is pal, and would never really try to steal his crush unless it was for a revenge scheme or something.

"So, I'll get in the shower now?" He checked with everyone.

"Sure," Margaret answered, "What kind of bagel you want? I got plain, onion, sesame, or everything."

"Uh, how about everything? And you got any cream cheese?"

"Everything with cream cheese, coming up," Margaret whistled as she took out the bagles, cream cheese and butter from the fridge.

Mordecai headed in to the bathroom, ready for a nice, warm, refreshing shower.

* * *

><p><em>9:00.<em> Dudley rushed to the front doors of TUFF HQ. He was late! His shift started at 8:30. He usually worked from 8-5, but every now and then, he got some slack and got to come in a little late. He ran into the office from the front door, and turned to the clock-in list on the wall. He reached for his time card, but was surprised to find that he was already punched in.

_Kitty._ She must have clocked him in already. Dudley smiled as he thought about her. She was always looking out for him, trying to keep him out of trouble when she could. She was an awesome partner, and an awesome friend.

Decided to stop at her cubicle before going to his. She did not seem to busy, just fiddling around with some stuff on her desktop.

"Morning, Kitty," Dudley waved, "Hey, thanks for covering for me again."

"Good morning," She smiled warmly at him, but then frowned, "What kept you late today?"

"Oh, well, I overslept. Sorry."

"You really got to quit doing that, and come in on time," She said, almost naggingly, "I can't keep punching in for you."

_Oh, great, another lecture._ Dudley thought, resisting the urge to roll his eyes.

"There's a lot of people out there who would kill to have the job of a TUFF agent. You're great, Dudley, but you have to take this job seriously, or the Chief will fire your ass someday."

"No way! The chief wouldn't do that! He loves me."

"I'm just saying, you should commit a little more to your job." Kitty turned back to her computer.

"So, anyway, anything going on today? Any assignments or missions or bad guys or anything?"

"No, not yet, but later today, Keswick is going to be interviewing people to be new agents and replace Shellington and Fleece."

"Oh. Cool." And then Dudley's mood saddened a little, remembering the funeral from yesterday, "I'm really going to miss them, especially Fleece. She always told the best sheep jokes."

"Yeah. I remember." Kitty was also sad about losing more comrades. She was use to it now in her career, but it was still always tragic to see two co-workers fall in the line of duty. This was the first TUFF death Dudley had seen. It must have been harder for him to see, but he was taking it surprisingly well.

"What was that one that got me every time? The one about the newspaper?"

"Okay, its 'what's a sheep's favorite newspaper?'"

"The wool street journal!" Giggled a new voice.

Dudley and Kitty turned to face RJ. "Morning guys."

"Hey RJ," Dudley smiled, "What's up?"

"Nothing really, just heading in to my little kingdom, you know?" He laughed, he was referring to his lab.

"Hey, RJ," Kitty asked, "Isn't your cousin coming for the interview today?"

"Rigby? Yeah, he's coming, and he's bringing his friend Mordecai. They just got fired, and I think this is a great opportunity for them to find decent jobs."

"Cool. I'd like to meet these guys," Dudley smiled.

"Well, if they get the job, you'll get plenty of time to get to know them."

"Do you think they'll get it?" Kitty asked.

RJ put a hand to his chin to think. "Hmm... Knowing Rigby, I'd say he has a fifty-fifty chance."

"That doesn't sound good."

"Believe me though, I'm praying for him."

* * *

><p>9:30. Rigby had finally finished his turn in the bathroom. He came out, his hair combed, and wearing the black neck tie that he wore for special occasions. On his wrist was a sleek wrist watch.<p>

"Lookin' sharp, buddy!" Mordecai retortled as Rigby stroll out toward the counter where breakfast was waiting. Margaret and Mordecai had waited for him.

"Thanks, you too, man," Rigby shot back as he hopped up into his chair at the counter. Mordecai was wearing a black business suit, with a white shirt and red tie under.

"You both look really handsome," said Margaret.

"Thanks." Mordecai replied.

"I'm sure you guys will do fine today," She continued, "I mean, if you guys really put your minds to things, you're smart and hardworking, and if you work together, you two can accomplish almost anything."

"Wow, thanks, Margaret," Mordecai replied. He had not thought of him and Rigby as a team that way in a long time. He certainly did not think they were as hard working as Margaret was giving them credit for.

"A little cheesy for my taste, but it sure was encouraging," Rigby chuckled as he reached for his coffee mug.

Mordecai picked up his. "I'd like to propose a toast. Here's to the best of luck at the interview."

"Best of luck to you guys!" Margaret raised her mug and clinked it against Mordecai's and Rigby's, and then they all took a big sip. They had each put some milk and sugar into their coffee, so each one was sweet and tasty.

Next, they started eating up their bagels before Margaret spoke up again.

"Okay, now if you guys are done and get back before I do for whatever reason, here's my spare key." She placed a blue key card on the table.

"Wow, you're trusting _us_ with your key?" Said Mordecai, who was dumbstruck.

"Sure. I can trust you guys, right?"

"Oh, yeah. We're _very_ trust worthy," Rigby smirked.

* * *

><p>10:15. In the office just beyond the civilian waiting room, Keswick looked over the resume again and frowned. He set the papers down and turned back to the llamas in front of him. One had brown fur and was wearing a red boater hat with a flower, while the other one, the one that scared Keswick, had grey fur and wore a green winter cap.<p>

"Well, you two would seem like ideal agents for the m-m-m-most part," Keswick said nervously.

"But what?" The grey llama sounded angry, and glared Keswick down.

"Well, I'm afraid we just can't accept someone with, um, a criminal record like this."

"WHAT!" The grey one shouted.

"Carl, I told you they wouldn't accept you," The brown llama said.

"How could you not want me?" The grey llama rose from his chair, "I have killed more people then there are in Hawaii! TUFF could use someone with my experience!"

"Carl!" The brown one whined, "You promised me you wouldn't freak out at this."

"I crossed my fingers, Paul."

"You don't have fingers!"

"Oh, to hell with you!"

"I'm sorry sir, but you didn't get the j-j-job." Keswick announced assertively. "Now please leave."

Still angry, Carl leaned over the desk into Keswick's face, and looked him straight in the eye.

"Um, do I need to call security?" Keswick reached for a button under the desk.

"Is that a threat?" Carl sneered. "Now listen here, Hamster, you better give me a job here, or stab you in the eyes thirty-seven times, cut open your rib cage, and then chop off your hands, cook them, and eat them with some fava beans and a nice chianti!"

"Carl, please, let's just go." Paul said in the calmest voice he could.

Too late. Two TUFF dog troopers entered the room through the door from behind Keswick, and headed around the desk. At first, Carl got ready to fight back, but one shot him with a tazer, knocking him out. Next, they both worked together to carry Carl out of the office.

"I'm really sorry about him," Paul said to Keswick in a very apologetic voice.

"Just go, please," Keswick answered with a straight face.

And with that, Paul got up from his seat, turned around, and headed out the room to catch up with Carl.

Keswick sighed. Man, that grey llama was scary. This was his first interview of the day. He had about a dozen more to go. This was going to be a long day for him. He was kind of looking forward to meeting RJ's cousin at 11. He had a few more appointments before that though. He was just going to have to suffer through them.

"Next!" He shouted. In came a certain blue-bottom booby wearing a purple business suit strolled in. He was wearing one of those fake glasses and mustache. Behind him followed a little hummingbird who was also wearing a fake mustache. Keswick was not fooled. He recognized them both immediately.

"Honestly, Bird Brain, did you really expect me to fall for that?" He hit the security button again.

* * *

><p>10:30. Mordecai raised his arm to a taxi that was coming by. It stopped right in front of them. Rigby was the first one in, Mordecai followed.<p>

"Where to, boys?" The human driver asked them monotonously.

"TUFF headquarters please," Rigby answered, "and could you get us there before 11?"

"Sure," he groaned. "Four bucks, please." He held out his hand from behind his seat.

Mordecai went through his wallet and pulled out a five and handed it too the man. The extra dollar was a tip. They had just stopped at the bank, and had cashed in their checks for change.

Taking the five, the driver pulled back into the street and started driving toward Petropolis.

Mordecai and Rigby were both excited and nervous. They still had high hopes that this interview would go well. They were still dressed in the spiffy outfits from before. They were taking nothing with them except their wallets, and the spartan helmet which Mordecai carried in his back pack. It was annoying because it was kind of heavy.

"Hey, Rigby, why are we taking the helmet again?" Mordecai asked as he took off his backpack and set it on the floor.

"I just thought just in case. You never know. We might need it. Maybe in can help us in our interview somehow."

"I have a really bad feeling about it. I mean, after all, it _is_ what cost us our last job."

"Well, you never know."

* * *

><p>Keswick looked back at his new clients, both had hopeful faces.<p>

"Well," He mumbled, "I'm sorry, but we can't accept you g-g-guys. You see, in order to work here, you need to be an animal, and you two are stick figures."

"What?" The red stick figure exclaimed, "You mean you're not even going to look at our freakin' resumes?"

"Red, calm down," The blue guy said to his friends, somewhat moodily. He turned to Keswick. "So, you can't make us agents?"

"I'm afraid not."

"Is there any job here for people who aren't animals? Anything at all?"

"No, I'm s-s-s-sorry."

"PLEEEEEEEAAAAAASSSEEE?" The red guy whined.

"There's nothing we can offer you here. I'm sorry. Now please leave."

"THIS IS AN OUTRAGE!" Red snapped, standing up from his chair. Keswick reached for the security button again.

"Come on, dude," Blue grumbled, "let's just get out of here."

"Oh, alright," Red pouted, and followed Blue out of the office.

"Next!" Keswick called.

A chihuahua and a red fat cat hopped out of their seats and strolled on into the office. They were the only ones left in the waiting room.

"Now, Stimpy, don't you DARE do anything to screw this up!" Ren hissed his companion.

"Relax, Ren," Stimpy said reassuringly, "I'll be on my _best_ behavior!"

Ren just glared back at Stimpy. He knew that his "best behavior" would not be a good thing.

* * *

><p>With five minutes to spare, the taxi pulled up in front of a huge skyscraper that said TUFF going down.<p>

"This must be the place," Mordecai observed.

"No duh," Rigby grumbled, "Why else would the building say TUFF?"

"Right," Mordecai giggled a little.

"See you guys later," Said the driver as Rigby got out of the car on the left side, while Mordecai grabbed his backpack and followed him out. When they were out, the taxi sped away.

Mordecai and Rigby looked up at the huge tower, jaws dropped and eyes wide. It was amazing. They imagined what it would be like inside, and what it would be like to work here. At the same time though, their hearts sank. How could two slackers who did not even finish college get accepted here?

"Well, we're not going to get the job standing around here," Rigby finally said, breaking the silence.

"Yeah, we can admire the place after we get the job," Mordecai followed his buddy in toward the front steps.

As they approached the front doors, suddenly the glass door swung open, and out walked two stick figures, one red and one blue.

"Well, I guess now we'll go back to our old jobs as camp counsilors," The blue one said cheerfully.

"Aw, do we _have_ to?" The red one whined, "That job sucked!"

"Come on, man! you loved working there!"

"Okay, I guess I had a little fun. But summer's almost over. Kind of late to sign up again."

"Oh, right." The blue guy's head sank.

"Hey, uh, excuse me?" Mordecai walked up to the guys, "Is this the place for the new job interviews?"

"Huh? Yeah. This is the place," Said Blue. "Just follow the signs, you can't miss it."

"I'm guessing you guys didn't get the job?" Rigby asked.

"Yep," Red answered droopily, "The only reason they didn't take us is because WE'RE NOT ANIMALS! I mean what the hell! The nerve of those people! The website didn't say anything about needing to be an animal!"

"Yeah it did, dude." Blue snapped.

"Well, I didn't see it! It was too small."

"Well, anyway, good luck to you guys," Blue finally said as he walked down the stairs.

"Thanks," Mordecai called after him as Red followed him away. He turned back to Rigby. "Well, here we go. Ready dude?"

"Oh, yeah. I am so pumped for this!" Rigby was looking ahead into the doors.

Mordicai reached ahead and pushed the door open, and he and Rigby walked on inside. Once they were in, they were just as amazed by the inside as they were outside. All around them there were computers and TV monitors. And doors that led to several different rooms.

On a post in the middle of the room was a sign that said _interviews this way_ and pointed ahead down a hallway. Mordecai and Rigby followed the hallway passed many more doors. Other animals were walking all over the place, some in lab coats, some in leather jackets, some dressed casually, some in hazard suits.

The boys soon came to a flight of stairs, and followed it up to the second floor. They continued following the signs to a large room that looked like a regular office building, with huge cluster of cubicles. Each cubicle had different people who were hard at work, doing either paperwork or computer work.

Finally, they came to a room closed off from the office room that looked like a typical waiting room, like one at the eye doctor. The room was completely empty, except for them. They had a seat in some chairs side by side.

Mordecai was sweating. "Dude, I think we should leave," He blurted out.

"What?" Rigby raised an eyebrow, "Why? Let's go in and get our interview! Why wouldn't you want to work here? Just look at this place! It's so cool!"

"Rigby, open your eyes! I have been looking over this place. We'll never pass the interview! There's no way we're qualified for this kind of stuff!"

"So what? You just want to back down now because we _might_ not get accepted? Just because the odds are against us? Come on! The worst they can do is say 'no' and send us home. It's not the end of the world if we don't pass. And if we _do_ pass, just think of what a new world it will open to us!"

"We're not getting in! Did you see the field agents and scientists who work here? We are nothing like them! There's no way they'll take us in!"

"Look, RJ went through all the trouble of setting us an interview here, and we went through the trouble of coming here! We've come this far and you want to back out now? No way! Not happening. We are going to get through this stupid interview, and we are going to do it together!"

Rigby's anxious, loud tone started to soften down a little. "Look, like I said, there's no harm if we fail here. I know we have failed a lot in the past at things, and I know it hurts to fail, but you can't quit on anything just because of that fear. It's when you give up like that that you truly fail. And if we fail, we fail together, and we'll just go looking for another job. So come on, Mordo, you with me?" Rigby held out his fist for Mordecai to bump it.

Mordecai was pretty moved by Rigby's speech. "Dude, this has got to be the strongest side of you I've ever seen." He was almost on the brink of tears.

"Oh, come on, don't start crying on me now!"

Mordecai held it in. "Of course I'm with you on this!" He bumped Rigby's fist.

"That's the spirit, dude!"

And before they could say anything else, the door in the front of the room swung open, and out stomped Ren and Stimpy. Ren looked really pissed, Stimpy was shaking and almost in tears.

"You, Idiot!" He snapped. "Everything was going perfectly! He almost took us in, and then _you_ had to go and sneeze on him! And then try to wipe him clean with your sock!"

"Well, you didn't have to hit me with the lamp," Stimpy sniffled.

"Honestly, how I became friends with you, I'll never remember!"

The two walked out the back of the room where Mordecai and Rigby had entered. "Next!" shouted a nasally voice from the office room. Mordecai and Rigby looked around at first, seeing again there was no one in the room.

"I guess we're up," Mordecai squeaked. He was sweating like crazy now, and his eyes were wide.

"Okay man, just relax, take a deep breath. We'll get through this together." Rigby was trying to be the strong one here, but he was actually really nervous himself.

The boy sat up from their chairs, and walked on into the office. It was very nicely kept office, and sitting at a large wooden desk in front of them was an odd little mammal in a lab coat and glasses. Neither of them could tell what kind of creature he was.

"May we sit?" Mordecai asked awkwardly.

"Yeah, of course," He answered.

Mordecai and Rigby sat down at the two chairs that were there. They were pretty comfy.

"Allow me to introduce myself," The mammal continued, "I am TUFF's leading scientist, Pra-pra-pra-Professor Keswick. I will be interviewing you today."

"Hey, if you don't mind me asking," Rigby spoke up, "what kind of creature are you?"

Mordecai punched Rigby in the arm. "Dude, that's rude!"

Keswick glared at Rigby a little, apparently offended by the question. "To answer that q-q-q-question, I am a lab experiment that resulted in a successful hybrid of several different an-an-animals."

"Woah, that's pretty cool," Mordecai stated.

"What's with the way you talk too?" Rigby asked. "Why do you keep getting stuck on s-s-some of your words?"

Mordecai face-palmed himself. _This is a disaster._ The thought. _There's no way we're getting this job._

"It is a speech impairment that I've had ever since my ch-ch-childhood," Keswick snapped, "Now will you please stop asking me such personal questions? I'm the one interviewing you!"

"Oh, I am sooo soo sorry," Rigby replied, trying to get Keswick to calm down.

Keswick glared down Rigby a little more before taking a deep breath. "Now, according to my paperwork, your names are Mordecai Feathers and Rigby M-M-Maskers, am I right?"

"Yep. That's us," Mordecai exclaimed.

"So, Rigby, you're RJ's cousin?"

"Mm-hm."

"Well, your cousin is the finest forensics specialist here, probably the best one TUFF's ever had."

"Yep, that's my cousin alright!"

"Now, I went over your resumes, and it says that you two were both groundskeepers before now, and before that, Mordecai, you were a cashier. You both f-f-finished high school, but you both dropped out of Brauch College."

"Well, yeah, that's all true," Mordecai admitted.

"Well, frankly, that's not a very impressive work history."

"Right..."

"Now tell me, do you have any experience with war, military, government agencies, or spies at all?"

"Well, when I was little, my parents sent me to military school one summer," said Rigby.

"Okay, I g-g-g-guess that counts for something." Keswick scribbled something on his clipboard. "Do you have any sort of special training for a job like this?"

"No, not really," Mordecai's eyes slid to the floor.

"Have you ever h-h-handled a firearm?"

"Do paint ball guns or laser tag count as firearms?" asked Rigby.

"No."

"Then no."

Keswick huffed again. "Do you two have any experience at all with fighting crime or the forces of evil?"

Suddenly, Mordecai's face lit up. "Well, crime, not really, but for the forces of evil, we have a lot of experience." And then Mordecai and Rigby told Keswick about all of their bizarre adventures that they had at the park, about their trip to the moon, how they battled a Satan head from a video game, about how they saved Skips from the mystical babies who guarded youth, about how they snuck into an astronaut complex during a lying contest (which Keswick counted as undercover work), saving the park from being overrun by hot dogs, their battle with the prank call master, how they journeyed to the dizzy underworld to rescue Pops, making it through the realm of Darthon, fighting Rigby's twisted evil self, Ygbir, fighting a zombie army and saving the people watching the movie (which Keswick really gave them credit for), and saving the stars of viral videos from the virtual prison.

"Wow, that's pretty impressive," Keswick said when they were done. "Sounds like you guys have a l-l-lot more experience than I thought. The only thing is some of that stuff I find hard to b-b-b-believe."

"Aw, dude, we're telling the truth on all of it!" Rigby whined, "I swear!"

Suddenly, jeopardy music started playing. "Oh, excuse me guys, that's my f-f-phone." Keswick took out his smart phone from his pocket. "I need to take this. I'll be right back. Wait here." He stood up from his seat, and left out the door in the back, leaving Mordecai and Rigby alone.

"How do you think we're doing?" Rigby asked.

"Dude, what were thinking before?" Mordecai snapped, "Asking him what kind of animal he is, and then about his speech impairment? What is wrong with you?"

"Yeah, I didn't think that through," Rigby moped. "Sorry about that."

"Well, anyway, he seems pretty impressed about some of the things we did at the park. We just might get this job yet!"

"You see? Still wish you had backed out before?"

"No way, dude!"

The door opened and Keswick came back in and sat down at the desk.

"Alright guys," He smiled, "Have I got a proposition for you! Now, on that call, I just received intel that Verminious Snaptrap, one of TUFF's g-g-g-greatest enemies, is plotting on creating an army of cheese monsters to take over Petropolis." He pushed a button on the desk, and a hologram appeared on it. It was a spinning model of a rat in a lab coat. That must have been Snaptrap, Mordecai thought.

"Wait, _cheese_ monsters?" Mordecai raised an eyebrow, "What kind of stupid idea is that?"

"Yeah, this guy is kind of a crack pot. He comes up with the weirdest evil schemes sometimes. But, he's a villain none the less. Thing is a lot of his evil schemes are cheese-related. He's also the leader of a gang called the Diabolical Order of Mayhem, or DOOM." Keswick pushed another button, and the hologram brought up a model of a possum, a crocodile, and a ferret. They must have been Snaptraps subordinates, the other members of DOOM.

"Now, here's the deal guys," Keswick continued, "If you can foil Snaptrap's plan and b-b-bring him to justice, the job is yours."

"Oh, sweet!" Rigby exclaimed, "We get to go up against a super villain!"

"So, are you giving us any sort of back-up or gadgets or anything?"

"Nope. I'll give you the location of DOOM's most recent secret base, but other than that, you guys are on your own."

"Oh, okay..." Mordecai started sweating again.

"Don't worry. After everything you guys have been through this summer, I'm sh-sh-sure you can handle this!"

"No problem!" Rigby said confidently, "We'll have Snaptrap behind bars before you can say 'hasta la vista'!"

"Alright then. Go get him."

"Thank you so much, Professor Keswick." Mordecai held out his hand to shake Keswick's. Rigby did the same.

"I hope to s-s-see you guys around again," He said shaking their hands.

Mordecai and Rigby stood up headed out of the office, ready to go catch a crook.

"Wait, guys!" Keswick called after them. "I didn't give you DOOM's last known location!"

**Author's Comment: And that concludes episode 3. Hope you enjoyed it. **


	4. Episode 4: First Mission

In DOOM's secret lair, Snaptrap and his men were all sitting around their large red room, just finishing their latest diabolical weapon for their scheme. In the center of the room was a large metal tank, filled to the brim with boiling melted cheese. One might think of it as a forge, only with cheese instead of metal. At the base of the tank was another closed tank and a computer console.

While Snaptrap lay back in his lawn chair, reading a book, his five subordinates were busy carrying buckets of cheese up a ladder to pour into the forge.

"Hey, guys, how much longer until the machine's ready?" The boss asked impatiently.

"Just a few more loads, boss," Ollie replied.

"It would go a little quicker if you helped us out!" Larry snapped.

"Larry, I'm the boss, so I don't have to work if I don't want to." Snaptrap glared at his nerdy brother-in-law. "You want another time-out in the shark tank?"

"No! Sorry!" Larry got scared and got back to work. Snaptrap went back to his book.

"Soon," he thought outloud, ringing his hands, "I'll rule all of Petropolis, and then the world. All will tremble before my army of cheese minions!"

"Hey, boss, why did you decide to use cheese monster again?" Asked Francisco, the Alligator, "I mean, you're allergic to cheese."

"I just thought maybe it would give me a reason to like cheese if I can't eat it, you know?"

Snaptrap looked at his watch as Francisco got back to work. "Weird, I would have thought Agents Puppy and Katswell would be here by now."

* * *

><p>Mordecai and Rigby stood in a small parking lot a wide, two-story red brick building. They had taken a bus the address Keswick wrote down on the slip of paper for them. Getting ready for messy work, they had taken off their ties and stored them in Mordecai's backpack, so now they were in their usual naked attire. Mordecai quickley checked the address again.<p>

"Well, this is the right place," He said.

"No duh," Rigby muttered, "What do you think that sign is there for?" He pointed up to a sign over the wooden door that read, in large green neon lettering _DOOM Base #3_.

"Yeah, good point there," Mordecai said quietly. "Well, there doesn't appear to be any guards or cameras or alarms or anything, I think we're safe out here." He took a step closer to the door, and leaned against the door gently, holding his ear to it, listening.

"Okay, boss, we're just about done," He heard a British-accented man say, "This is the last bucket of cheese."

"Super!" Another man's voice said excitedly.

Mordecai pulled away from the door. "Yep. They're in there alright. Now, we need a plan to get inside without being noticed." He crossed his arms, trying to think.

"Let's just do what _all_ spies do in the movies!" Rigby smirked.

"What?"

Rigby pointed up to an large outdoor vent by the door.

"Oh! I see what you're getting at," Mordecai grinned.

Rigby snatched a pencil from Mordecai's back pack, and quickly used it as a screwdriver to unhinge the vent. When he took it off, he got down on all fours and crawled into the dark duct. Mordecai crawled in after him.

"We just got to be quiet," Rigby whispered, "They could hear your steps echo on the duct."

"Excuse me, what do you mean _my_ steps? What about _your_ steps?" Mordecai hissed.

"You're bigger than me, you weigh more than me, so your steps are louder than mine."

"Shut up! I may be heavier, but you're still heavy. With all that junk food you eat you're probably overweight!"

"Shut up!"

"No, you shut up!"

Suddenly, Rigby bumped his head against something metal.

"Ow," He whined.

"What?"

Rigby felt to his sides. There were more walls. And then he felt up above his head. The duct went up.

"Time to go up," He whispered. He put one hand and one food on one wall, while putting the others on the other. He shimmied up the duct this way like Spiderman, Mordecai following doing the same.

* * *

><p>"Alright, guys!" Snaptrap exclaimed, so that's all the cheese, right?"<p>

"Yep. That's everything," Larry muttered.

"Alright then! Let's get to work!" Snaptrap got up out of his lawn chair and stretched his arms and legs quick. He had been sitting there reading for quite a long time. Before he could turn towards the computer console, he heard a deep bumping sound that seemed to echo.

"Hey, you guys hear that?" He asked.

"Yeah, sounds like someone's going through the ventilation system." Ollie pointed to the duct on the rock wall of the lair. Following his pointing everyone looked up at the duct. They indeed heard echoing bumping sounds of someone crawling through, along with some muffled grunts and curses.

"Hm," Snaptrap thought for a second. "Eh, probably just those stupid rats again," he shrugged. He walked over to the console and started pushing buttons. "And now, once we get this baby fired up, I'll have the DEADLIEST Army in Petropolis! With regeneration and shapeshifting capabilities, they'll be UNSTOPABLE! MWAHAHAHA!" He paused his laugh suddenly, "Right Ollie? The monsters will be able to do that?"

"Yep! I checked the input of energy. They will have those abilities!"

"Excellent!" Snaptrap turned back to the controls and started wringing his hands. Just then, another thought came to him. "Seriously! Where are Agents Puppy and Katswell?" He looked at his watch. It read 5:45. "They're starting to scare me they're so late!"

* * *

><p>Inside the vents, Rigby and Mordecai were still trudging along in the darkness. Both were becoming anxious and excited inward. They were so thrilled that they were about to take on an actual super villain, and win that new job!<p>

Actually, Mordecai was really nervous as well as thrilled. Back in the park, whenever they faced a villain, usually Benson, Skips, Muscle Man, and even Pops in some cases, were usually there to back them up. This time, however, they were alone. Not even other TUFF agents would help them. They would have to battle this wicked mind- Snaptrap, was it?- all on their own.

Mordecai was so deep in his thoughts that he bumped into Rigby's rear, who had stopped.

"Ow!" He hissed, "Dude, what happened? Why'd you stop?"

"Oh, sorry," He replied," I found our way in.

Mordecai peeked around him and saw that they had come to some vents, light pouring in through the gaps.

Rigby hopped over to the other side so Mordecai could look over from his side. They both peered down through the vents.

Below was a large round room, about the size of a ballroom. The walls were red brick, and the floor a dark brown. In the middle of the room was a huge tank, filled to the open brim with boiling yellow cheese. At the foot of the tank was a computer console, at which sat a rat in a lab coat, surrounded by a bunch of other thugs, including a possem, a ferret, an alligator, a tall white dog, and a blue bear in a pirate suit.

"There they are," Rigby whispered.

"I think they said they were just about ready to activate the machine and summon the cheese minions," Mordecai replied.

"Then we better get down there and act fast!" Rigby reached over, opened up the backpack, and took out the heavy spartan helmet, plopping it hard on his head. "Better bring a little extra head protection," he chuckled.

"What? No, wait dude! We can't just leap down there and charge in! We need to plan something out!"

"COme on! Forget plans!"

"But they might _shoot_ us! Look at their belts, they have guns!" In fact, they did each have green-rimmed laser guns in holsters on their belts, each one of them. But of course, Rigby did not think it through.

"We'll just have to be careful," He shrugged, "Oh, wait! I got it! Remember those _Death Kwon Do_ moves we learned? Or those wrestling moves we've seen on TV? Just use those! Now come on! Let's kick some ass!" With impulsive haste, he pulled the vents off the opening, revealing a hole big enough for them both to squeeze through.

"Rigby!"

Too late. Rigby jumped down out of the vent to the ground. Grunting with frustration and rolling his eyes, Mordecai jumped down after his friend.

They both landed with a thud on the concrete floor, though on their feet gracefully. Immediately, the six villains turned their attention from the computer to the intruders.

"Hold it right there, dude!" Rigby barked.

"HEY! You guys aren't Agents Puppy and Katswell. Who the hell_ are_ you?" Snaptrap asked, raising an eyebrow.

"And what's with that helmet?" Larry pointed to Rigby's helmet.

"I'm Rigby! And this is Mordecai! We're TUFF's newest agents, and we're here to stop you, ratface!"

Mordecai slapped Rigby on the head, harder than usual.

"Ow! Dude!"

"YOU DUMBELL!" Mordecai screamed, "What's wrong with you! Why would you tell _him_ all that? What are you thinking?"

Rigby rose his finger and opened his mouth to argue, when what Mordecai was saying started to sink in. "Oh," he pouted, "Sorry, I just got so excited."

"Eh- you want us to blow their brains out, boss?" Francisco asked, eagerly reaching for the blaster at his belt.

"Nah, not yet." Snaptrap flashed a viciously evil grin. "This is a great opportunity to try out our new toys." He turned back to Mordecai and Rigby. "Well, newbies, let's see if you can handle _this_!" He pushed a big orange button on the control panel.

The cheese at the top of the tank started to boil and bubble and sizzle. Suddenly, three globs of melted rose up, and slipped over the edge, trickling down the sides until they reached the floor. Mordecai and Rigby just stood their ground and watched as the blobs each began to grow and morph and twist.

By the end of the transformation, the blobs had each molded into three new identical forms each at what would be Skipp's height. Each monster had a diamond-shaped torso and legs, with arms of three cheese wheels, and a monstrous head with a grizzly underbite. One of them groaned with the vigor of a Big Daddy from _Bioshock_.

"Get 'em!" Snaptrap commanded as he twisted a knob on the panel.

The monsters roared in unison, and charged at Mordecai and Rigby.

"Alright dude!" Rigby smirked, "Let's do this!" Rigby lurched forward toward the frontmost monster, and gave a bloodcurdling scream like a mighty warrior. Mordecai, standing back for a second to watch is partner, could tell he was building up rage for his Death Punch. He drew back his fist, and lept at the monster. Almost instantly, it exploded, shattered into a thousand little cheese crumbs.

The second monster raised its own left "hand". The wheel instantly shifted into the dual-sided blade of a battle axe. It swung down, aiming to slice Rigby in half down the middle, the swiftness seeming to cut right through the air. Rigby managed to barrel roll to the right, narrowly dodging the blade as it cut into the floor.

Mordecai snapped out of his trance. _Time to get crazy! Time to be brave!_ He ran forward to help Rigby. Before the monster could raise its arm to swing again, Mordecai ran into it, slamming into its soft, sticky exterior, tackling it to the ground with a thud. With his free hand, he punched as hard as he could into the monster's face. The sticky cheese held his fist back at first, but Mordecai managed to pull it free. The blow had made an imprint on he monster's face, crushing its jaw a little, and caving in its eyes.

The next thing that happened shocked him though. As though it were a balloon being puffed up with air, the face began to heal and puff up again. Within seconds, the monster had completely healed its wound. It stared daggers at Mordecai with angry red eyes, and snarled.

Rigby felt some aching in his arm. He forgot how exhausting it was using doing a death punch without the proper attire. He looked around for another way to beat these monsters. He looked up against nearest wall, and saw a lead pipe laying down on the ground. He ran over towards the wall, and picked up the heavy pipe It was about as long as Mordecai's arm, though thin enough to fit in his hands.

"Mordecai, Catch!" He shrieked. He lifted the pipe over his head and threw it with all his strength. It landed with a clang about two feet in front of him, and four away from Mordecai.

Confused, the DOOM boys sat still in an awkward silence, blinking and glancing at each other. The two remaining cheese monsters just grunted and raised their eyebrows, just as confused.

"Ah! Come on dude! Really?" Mordecai grunted.

"Hey! This thing is heavy!" Rigby snapped.

Mordecai pushed himself up off the ground, and trotted over to the pipe. He picked it up and held it like a baseball bat. "Alright! Come on!" He growled.

The monster he knocked down rose up, growled again, and charged. Mordecai waited another second, then screamed at the top of his lungs, and charged to meet it, his pipe pulled back ready to swing.

Just when they were second away from crashing, the monster raised its axe arm, preparing to chop, but Mordecai was faster and swung first, bashing the monster in the head. The monster must have been in some sort of pain, for it paused it's own strike. Mordecai did not stop, he jumped as high as he could, and brought the crook of the pipe down on the monster's scalp again. The force of the blow caused the monster to collapse to its knees. Mordecai continued to pound the monster to a pulp, also swinging downwards to smash the beast's sides. Cheese oozed and cushed all over the floor, pipe, and Mordecai's body.

The third monster did not wait any longer. It came at him, its right fist in the form of a viking hammer. Mordecai's instincts took it as the beast readied to swing. He held the pipe in his left hand, and readied himself, pushing back into the floor with his foot, and his right arm down like he was leaning on something. He willed himself to live, putting more energy into his arm. It all happening in a split second as the creature swung.

As the blow struck Mordecai's arm, the monster's entire arm exploded. The beast yelped in pain before Rigby lurched at it screaming. Rigby punched at it, trying to strike another death punch, but his fist only slipped into the monster's hide, and stuck there.

Rigby certainly felt pain in his arm still from the first punch. He figured without the right attire, he could only use one death punch every few hours.

The monster stared down and growled at him. Rigby snapped out of his thoughts, and reached up with his free arm, and lightly slapped the monster on the cheek. He then proceeded to just as lightly pat the beast all over his face, then his shoulders down, to his chest.

Confused, the monster paused his strike, and looked down at the raccoon with a dazed look.

"_What_ is he doing?" Snaptrap turned to his men. They were all again dumbstruck. They all just shrugged.

Mordecai raised his pipe again. "Dude, duck!" He pulled back and swung and the monster's side. Rigby curled up and got down to dodge the blow. The pipe struck the side of the beast, causing an indent in its 'ribs'. Mordecai swung again, hitting the monster's left arm, chopping it off the body, then its left arm, and then the head and upper body, until it was reduced to another oozing blob like its brother.

"Haaaaambooooning!" Rigby cooed.

"What is it with you and that move?" Mordecai panted. He was pretty tired already, and he was sure Rigby was tired too.

"WHAT?" Snaptrap exclaimed. "My monsters aren't enough to beat two noob TUFF agents?"

"Well, technically, they said they weren't official agents yet," Larry interjected.

"Shut up, Larry!" Snaptrap shouted at the little possum, "That doesn't make me feel any better!"

"So, you want us to shoot them now?" Smirked Francisco, hungrily eying Mordecai and Rigby.

"No! We still need this to get our minions the right way!" Snaptrap yelled at the alligator before turning to the control panel. "Let's see, decrease fragility" He started twisting some knobs, "increase durability increase regeneration, increase strength, increase stickiness, more density, more malleability, and maybe a teeny-tiny notch more of intelligence." When he was done, he jammed a button on the panel."That should do it!"

The three oozing blobs began to bubble suddenly. The trails of liquid cheese that have been running off began to flow backwards, as in back towards the blobs they came from.

"Uh-Oh, dude," Mordecai panted. He held his pipe at the ready, "Get ready!"

Rigby stood up at Mordecai's back in some kind of Karate stance.

The blobs, two facing Rigby and one facing Mordecai, started to bubble more and mold, and started to rise up, as though a person were under the thick blanket of cheese, and trying to stand up. The shapes molded and compacted more, until finally they formed their original beastly forms.

One of them roared and pointed at the duo, and they all charged. The two that were going for Rigby swung at him with fists and hammers. Their torsos also started forming hooks and tentacles that came shooting out. Rigby managed to dodge, jump, duck, and roll out of their ways. He was a slippery little pest, but how long could he keep it up for?

His pipe in hand, Mordecai lept at the third monster. It swung at him horizontally with a sword arm, but Mordecai ducked. Its arm still swinging, Mordecai swung with his pipe at the beast's face. The blow landed, but instead of slicing through or smashing the head clean off, the pipe stuck into the cheek.

The monster seemed unfazed by the blow or the pipe stuck in its cheek. Mordecai tried to pull it back, but it would not budge. Mordecai pulled harder, but it was as though it were strongly glued, or even cemented to the beast's cheek.

The beast smirked. Before Mordecai could make another move, the beast took its right arm, and formed a fist with it. It slugged hard underhand into Mordecai's stomach.

Mordecai was sent tumbling back against the hard cold floor. The fist felt rock solid when it struck. As he sat up, he felt a sharp pain in his guts. He grunted and bit back the pain as he forced himself to his feet, holding his side.

"You okay, dude?" Rigby called over.

"I don't know," Mordecai grunted. Now he was scared. What to do now? They could not beat these monsters in this form. Now he lost his pipe and was hurt, and Rigby could barely hold his own aside from dodging blows. What were they gonna do?

Meanwhile, Snaptrap smiled at what he was seeing. "Okay, looks like these guys are ready. Let's send a few more in and finish these guys off." His subordinates nodded with wicked grins on their faces. Snaptrap twisted another knob on the panel, probably for number of monsters, and pushed another button.

Several more trails of yellow ooze drooped down the sides of the boiling tank. Upon reaching the floor, they all shaped into monsters of the same image as their brothers, and slowly started shifting towards Mordecai and Rigby.

Mordecai counted about twenty in all. _Now_ they were screwed.

"Capture them alive, boys!" Snaptrap yelled proudly at his minions.

The monsters each grinned menacingly. One of them suddenly morphed and compacted its body into the form of a snake about three yards long.

Before Mordecai could make another move, the snake lashed at him, and caught him in a boa constrictor-like hold in the blink of an eye. It then whipped around and caught Rigby in the same hold. Luckily, he had still managed to dodge all of the other two monster's attacks, and the only scratches on him were a few cuts through his fur. Good thing the snake caught him ,or he may have gotten actually hit at one point.

The snake leaped upward onto the ceiling, and dangled Mordecai and Rigby down like they were on a rope. The cheesy body was sticky enough to stick to the roof.

"AHHH-HA-HA-HA-HAW!" Snaptrap cackled. His henchmen and minions all cackled along with him. The men had rather nasily laughs, especially Larry, while the minions had deep bubbly laughs.

"So, you guys thought you could be TUFF agents?" Snaptrap called out mockingly, "You guys are chumps! There's no way you could stop an evil genius like me?"

Mordecai knew Snaptrap was right. He and Rigby were just losers in over their heads, trying to get a cool job that was WAY out of their leagues.

"Now, I'll give you the benefit of the doubt and let you die a traditional secret-agent death: By dropping you into the shark tank!" He pushed another button on the panel, and suddenly the floor under Mordecai and Rigby opened up, revealing a pool of clear blue water, containing three large, hungry-looking Tiger sharks.

"Well, looks like this is it, Rigby," Mordecai sighed. "It was great knowing you, dude. We had some great times."

"Don't say that, dude," Rigby smiled, "It's not over yet."

"Dude, what do you mean it's not over! Look at us, we're tied up, dangling over a shark tank and twenty-something goons! We're gonna die!"

"Shut up! I have a plan! I'll fix this!"

"Ugh!" Mordecai rolled his eyes. He thought Rigby was just being stubborn and a loser.

"Alright boys," Snaptrap grimaced, ringing his hands. "Any last words?"

"Yes," Rigby answered loudly, and confidently, "Three: This. Is. Sparta!"

Suddenly, a roll of thunder was heard rumbling outside.

"Hm, odd," Ollie remarked, "I don't recall a thunderstorm in the broadcast today."

A second later, there was a sudden crashed, and dozens of figures crashed in through the roof.

It was the skeleton spartan warriors summoned by the helmet. Each was fully armed, and screaming and growling with might.

"Alright!" Rigby cheered, "The calvary has arrived!"

Upon hitting the floor, the warriors started to slice and bash the monsters. "Attack!" Snaptrap barked at them. Each monster fought valiantly, but the ancient, super-trained warriors were stronger and smarter, and fought back hard. They were winning clearly.

The snake that held Mordecai and Rigby dropped them, but a warrior caught and saved them before they hit the water.

When they were safely on the ground again, Mordecai playfully banged Rigby on the head, hitting the helmet. "Dude, why didn't you just use the helmet to begin with?"

Rigby just shrugged.

"Can we blast them now, boss?" Francisco whined.

"Yes!" Snaptrap gulped, sweat tricking down his face. Each DOOM boy took the blaster from their holster and aimed at the warriors.

"Come on," Mordecai barked, "We gotta destroy that machine!" He held out his hand to a warrior, who tossed him a broadsword. He held the handle at the ready with two hands.

"Fire!" Snaptrap ordered. Each henchman shot green laser blasts at the duo as they charged toward them.

However, a few warriors with shields lept out to shield the duo. The steel shields easily held against the green lasers.

Mordecai felt a twitch of fear, or a lot of fear really, as the lasers blasted at him. But this was no time for fear. This was their chance to finish this. They were so close. They were going in for the kill!

They were feet away from the panel. A warrior with a mace banged Francisco on the head. One with a flail knocked down Bad Dog and Leather Teddy. Ollie and Larry just ran away from one with a sword who was chasing them.

"Oh, snap!" Snaptrap cursed. Rigby jumped up onto his face and tackled him.

Mordecai raised his broadsword, and brought the blade down hard on the panel, slicing through right through it. It sparked and sizzled. After a second, it exploded, pushed back the three men in front of it, though not really hurting them, but covering them in soot.

The panel sparked more. Electricity traveled up the wires and the tank. Cheese bubbled and spilled out the sides more. The monsters out all groaned in agony, and melted down into puddles. The warriors all raised their weapons and cheered in victory. Each member of DOOM sat down together, all bruised and tied up, groaning in pain and dizziness.

"I will now plot my revenge!" Snaptrap yelled.

"Well, looks like our work here is done," Mordecai smiled and dusted himself off. "Now, let's call TUFF to come pick these guys up." He forgot that neither him nor Rigby had a cellphone.

"No problem," Rigby smiled. "Let's use Snaptrap's phone." He held out an old fashioned cell phone to Mordecai.

"Oh, come on dude, no need to go digging through the guy's pocket," Mordecai smiled and shook his head at his partner.

"Yeah, I would have let you guys borrow it!" Snaptrap muttered.

"Really?" Mordecai asked.

"Yeah, really.

* * *

><p>The next morning, under a bright sunny sky, a huge cheering crowd of animals, both civilians and TUFF agents, were gathered in front of TUFF Headquarters. Balloons and confetti were flying through the air, and a few red banners were streamed up.<p>

At the front of the crowd, on the front porch of the building, Mordecai and Rigby proudly stood along side a podium on which Chief Dumbrowski stood. a large TV screen enlarging him and the scene via a camera, so that everyone could see him and the new agents. Keswick stood on the other side of the podium, holding a large purpled pillow with a few knick-knacks on it.

Rigby was showing off to the crowd, flexing his 'muscles', doing peace signs with his fingers. Mordecai was simply smiling and waving. It was a truly joyful and proud moment for him. He and Rigby had worked hard, saved the city and conquered evil all by themselves. Perhaps they were not total losers after all, perhaps they_ could_ make it in TUFF.

"YEAH! _That's_ my little cuz'!" Screamed RJ from the crowd.

He smiled and waved out to the crowd, his eyes scanning across the smiling cheering faces. Suddenly, he noticed one face, and did a double-take to see Margaret, who was smiling and waving, and looking right at him!

"HEY! Margaret!" Mordecai smiled and waved to her. He was so happy to see her. He remembered when they had returned to her apartment last night, and told her of their success. She was so happy for them, and the fact that she had come again to see them inaugurated made him even happier, even if she had said she would come earlier.

"YEAH! MORDECAI! WOOO!" She screamed with glee.

Mordecai and Rigby directed their attention to the the podium as the chief started speaking.

"OUT-Standing job, boys!" He boomed, "You defeated Snaptrap and saved Petropolis!"

"Yeah, we know." Rigby rolled his eyes, knowing the obvious.

Mordecai elbowed him. "Dude, show some respect!" He snapped.

"Sheesh, sorry," Rigby groaned, rubbing his arm.

"And now," The Chief continued, more to the whole crowd than to just the duo alone, "it is with great pride that I welcome TUFF's latest heros, Agent Mordecai Feathers, and Agent Rigby Maskers. Keswick, if you will..."

With a smile and no words, Keswick marched over to the duo with the pillow. "Congratulations guys," He said, "you are officially hired. Here are your badges, and your standard-issue TUFF l-l-l-laser blasters."

He held the pillow out to them. Mordecai and Rigby each took one golden badge, attached to a strip of leather, and one purple-rimmed pistol.

"Awesome!" Squeaked Rigby. He inspected the badge, first thinking it was real gold, and then took the blaster out of its holster to check it out.

Unable to maintain his excitment any longer, Mordecai took out his gun as well, and started pointing it at things like he was in an action movie, and then spun it around on his finger, knowing it was on safety.

"Better look out, crooks!" He smirked, "New TUFF agents on patrol!"

The duo then shared in their trademark "OOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHH!"

After about ten seconds, they died down and remembered this was a time to show dignity and maturity. The Chief was actually starting to roll his eyes.

Regaining their posture, they put their badge and gun under one arm, and Mordecai spoke up. "Thank you, Chief. We are honored to receive this job, and we'll do our best to keep the streets of this city safe." He then lifted his free hand into a firm salute.

"Yeah, what he said," Rigby smiled, "Thanks."

"That's what I like to hear," the Chief's smile returned. "Welcome to the corps!"

* * *

><p><em>"Welcome to the corps!"<em> The Chief's voice echoed on a desktop computer screen. In a dark room, the screen being the only light, the monitor sat on a large, expensive wooden desk over a keyboard. Also on the desk was a sticky-note pad, a pen-holder, and a darkened picture frame, and a little bobble head of a pig in a General's attire, with a black mustache, Joseph Stalin.

At the desk, sitting in an expensive-looking Executive leather chair was a large silhouetted figure, glaring at the screen, understanding everything going on, staring daggers at the joyous blue jay and raccoon.

Another figure suddenly entered the room, also silhouetted in the darkness. This figure was tall, and thin. "Your blackberries, sir," The figure said in a scratchy, hoarse , thick Russian voice. He extended an arm, and placed a fine wooden bowl of blackberries on the desk, gleaming in the screen's light.

"Thank you," The former figure replied in a deeper Russian-accented voice, though not as thick. He reached out with a large, furry arm, grabbing a few blackberries in stubby fingers, and popped them into his mouth. As he chomped down on them with his sharp teeth, some thick black syrup dripped from his jaw. He took a handkerchief out from his pocket and wiped his face.

The second figure came around the desk and peered at the screen from behind the chair.

"So," he said, "what do you make of these new agents?"

"They are amateurs, wannabes, losers," the larger figure spat. "At first glance, I see no threat in them."

"So then, we have no need to worry?"

"Let us not worry until later. There is still much to do on our master plan, am I right? So, let us proceed with the plan, and in the mean time, we'll keep an eye on these two, as well as the rest of TUFF."

"Understood. So, I'll get back to work on those documents you asked me to complete?"

"Yes."

"It will be done, Sir." And with that, the second figure walked away, through the door at the front of the room, where the desk was facing. There was a flash of light as he opened and closed the door.

The first figure, alone in the room again, peered down at the the screen again, at the blue jay and raccoon again.

"You two don't know how soft Snaptrap was being on you. You have _no idea_ what a dangerous life awaits you now."

**Author's Comments: I'm SO sorry that it took so long to update. I've been busy with my other stories and school.**

**The Pig Stalin Bobble head is actually a reference to a certain book, can you guess what book?**

**On a final note, I hope all my fans out there enjoyed this chapter. I'll bring up the next one eventually. In the mean time, please subscribe, favor, and review. Especially review!**


	5. Episode 5: New Friends

For the rest of the morning that day, Mordecai and Rigby followed RJ around as he gave them a tour of TUFF Headquarters. Both of them were astounded by all the different rooms and areas to visit, and how vast the building was. They were so happy RJ was giving them a tour, or they probably would have gotten lost that day. RJ said that the longer they worked there, the easier they would find it to find their way around.

They explored the laboratories, where RJ, Keswick, and the dozens of other scientists did their many studies, testing, inventing, and experiments. They walked passed such machines as treadmills, beakers, bunsen burners, incinerators, gravity lifts, laser blasters, portal guns, a room behind a glass wall where blinding explosions took place. The whole place looked terrifyingly dangerous, and still fun. Mordecai and Rigby had never seen so many interesting gizmos and toys in one place.

Later came the archives room, which seemed like a library in so many ways. Filing cabinets reached up three stories. Each one was suppose to contain information regarding countries, criminals, agents, other agencies, historical archives, and so much more. This was one of the more boring places to visit to Mordecai and Rigby, but RJ said that if they ever needed information on anything, to come here and the librarians would be more than happy to help. RJ even took the time to introduce them to Agent Jumbo, the elephant who had been a librarian agent for five years, who was particularly sweet.

After that came the secret weapons room, which was just as cool, if not cooler, than the laboratory. There were so many cool gadgets to play with, but RJ hurried the boys along before they could get their hands on anything.

After that was the gym, which also had a pool and karate dojo. There were many weightlifting machines that the boys were interested to check out later. In the same wing they came across the shooting range where TUFF agents went to practice and hone their skills with blasters and firearms.

In the lower floors was TUFF's personal jailhouse, where TUFF held criminals for interrogation and such things. They only had about ten cells total, since Petropolis Prison was really meant for holding most criminals. There was also a room with a one-way window that was used for such interrogation sessions.

At one point, they visited the office of Dr. Soren Hornbeak, the TUFF psychologist, and a leading medical operative. Dr. Hornbeak was a kindly old owl with thick glasses, who offered the boys a seat and some tea as they entered and exchanged introductions. His room looked rather comfy and homey. While most of the rest of the building was blue, this room was white with a dark green carpet. He had a desk with a desktop computer, and four black leather armchairs surrounding a coffee table in the center. There were also a couple paintings on the walls. Hornbeak told the boys that if there was ever something they needed to talk about, he was a friend to all TUFF agents. They could come and see him anytime and talk to him about anything, and he would try to help them any way he could.

They also met Percy Pica, RJ's intern. Percy was a really nice guy, and a bright one at that. After a chat, Mordecai and Rigby found out that he was majoring in Anatomy at Petropolis State University. He was about to start his third year, and was later planning on attending Petropolis Medical School and becoming a doctor. As 21-year-olds, the three of them naturally had some laughs and became friends quickly. Mordecai and Rigby noted that they would have to take Percy out to hang out with them some time. RJ got a little worried at that thought, thinking his little cousin would corrupt his young intern.

After that came another of their favorites: The snack room. It seemed like the typical break room one would find in an office building. On one counter was a coffee maker and a toaster, and a mini-refrigerator. There was also a large vending machines with dozens of inconveniently unlabeled buttons. RJ remembered a few of them, but Mordecai and Rigby could tell it would take them time to figure everything out.

At last, their tour ended at the main office room, where dozens of cubicles lined the room, a TUFF agent working hard at each at their computers or files. Mordecai was carrying a bin of documents and folders that RJ said they should keep around. RJ showed Mordecai and Rigby to one nearly empty cubicle, with nothing but a desk, desktop computer, an empty filing cabinet and waste basket under the desk, and an armless office chair.

"Okay, guys," RJ spoke up. "This was Agent Fleece's cubicle before she passed. This is where you'll be working. Oh don't worry, we cleaned out all of her wool sheddings, heh." The three smiled at that last little joke. "Now, uh, there's nothing really going on today, it's kinda a quiet day, so you can just use this time to get settled in, maybe get to know some more agents here. Maybe you wanna go practice with some of the weapons and gadgets we got, ya know?"

"Alright, sounds good," Mordecai replied as he gently set down the box on the desk.

"If you guys need me," RJ continued, "you can come see me down in my lab, or you can find Chief Dumbrowski in his office over there." RJ pointed over the cubicles to the other side of the room, where there was a set of blue wooden doors. "Now, the Chief's a really nice, understanding guy, but I wouldn't bother him unless it was an emergency. Actually if you go around meeting the other TUFFies, try not to bother anyone who looks busy, and don't make a lot of noise."

"Alright then, cool," Rigby spoke up, hopping into the chair and swirling around in it. "Sounds like we're all good here."

"Alright, good. I'll see you guys later." RJ turned to head back toward the elevator back to the lab. After a second though, he turned back to the duo.

"Oh, one last thing," he stuttered, "Mordecai, I heard you beat most of Snaptrap's monsters with a lead pipe yesterday, right?"

"Well, yeah," Mordecai answered.

"You should have seen him," Rigby smirked, "he kicked ass back there with that pipe."

"Well then, I have a little present for you." RJ reached into his coat, and pulled out a long rod, about the length of Mordecai's arm, wrapped in colorful wrapping paper. "Consider it my welcoming gift."

Mordecai took the wrapped rod, which seemed hard and heavy, and tore the wrapping off, revealing a metal baseball bat. The handle was wrapped in black rubber for grip, while the actual club part was just plain grey metal.

"Wow, thanks RJ," Mordecai smiled.

"I figured this would be a good weapon for you to use next time you get into a fight."

Mordecai held the bat at the ready, and did a few practice swings. One swing almost hit the cubicle wall.

"Woah, there cowboy," RJ raised his voice, "Easy. If you wanna practice with it, go to the dojo in the gym."

"Oh, right sorry. Thanks," Mordecai chuckled awkwardly. He put the bat down, propped up in the corner under the desk. He also picked up the wrapping paper he dropped on the floor, and slipped it into the waste basket.

"Hey, where's _my_ welcoming gift?" Rigby whined as he hopped down from the chair.

"Uh, sorry Rigby." RJ scratched the back of his head. "I couldn't really think of anything good to get for you. How about for now, let's just say I owe you something? If something comes up, and you think of something you want, let me know."

"Oh, okay," Rigby looked down at the floor, plainly disappointed.

"Alright. I'm going to go get back to work," RJ continued. "I'll see you guys later. Oh, and again, congratz on getting the job here." And with that, RJ turned and headed toward the elevator.

Rigby still looked pretty bummed out that RJ had not gotten him anything.

"Aw, cheer up, dude," Mordecai smiled. "You'll think of something to ask RJ for." He took a seat in the chair. "Wow! I can't believe we're working at a place like this!"

"Yeah, its pretty cool here." Rigby's smile returned. "So, what are we going to do first, since there's nothing really we're suppose to do."

"Well, I guess we should go over these files here and get our desk set up and organized, ya know?" Mordecai reached into the box and took out some folders.

"What?" Rigby exclaimed angrily, "Aw come on! The first thing we're going to do on the job is paperwork?"

"SHH!" Mordecai snapped. "Keep your voice down! We don't wanna disturb anyone, remember?"

Rigby continued in a more hushed tone, though he was still pretty pissed. "How come we gotta do paperwork today? It's so boring!"

"Look, I don't know how secure our job is here, but we're probably walking a line a lot thinner than at the park. If we wanna keep working here, we gotta take our responsibilities a little more seriously. And this is the first step to it."

"Fine."

In his mind, Mordecai actually knew how boring this was going to be. After a second, he thought of something that would cheer both himself and Rigby up. "Tell ya what. Let's just look over these files, organize them into the cabinet here, then maybe go to the firing range to practice our guns, and then we'll go check out some of the weapons in the weapons room. How 'bout that?"

Rigby smiled again. Clearly he was imagining how fun those last two things would be. "Sounds good to me. Okay. Let's do this."

* * *

><p>About an hour later, just a few cubicles down, Kitty was sitting at her desk, doing a little computer work, when Dudley walked up behind her.<p>

"Hey, Kitty," He said happily, getting her attention. "I'm gonna say hi to the new guys. Wanna come?"

"Sure. I have a few minutes," Kitty smiled and stood up. Together, they walked over to Mordecai and Rigby's cubicle.

"I was thinking, how about we bring them a glass of water too?"

"That's a good idea, as long as it's from the pitcher, not the toilet."

"Aw, come on, will you ever let that go? I did that just one time!"

The latter duo had read through an easy-made guide about the basics of being a TUFF agent, though not really memorizing it, and put it neatly into their filing cabinet. Now they were reading through a folder about certain crime scene regulations. After that they planned on reading the file on foreign policies.

At the end of the the readings, they had a basic information application that they needed to submit to the membership office by the end of the day. After that, they were free to go and play around with the weapons.

They had taken all of the documents out of the box, and stacked them up on the desk to look at before putting into the cabinet. It also included a wall calender, with a theme of flowers, which the duo had hung up on the wall. The picture for August was that of a wide field of poppies under a bright blue sky.

Rigby had gotten an idea for the empty box. It was large enough to hold him lying down, so he put it under the desk to use as a bed for whenever he wanted to take a nap. He stood beside the chair, half-listening to Mordecai read the fine print out loud.

They soon heard footsteps coming toward them, and heard a man's voice.

"Hey, how's it going?" the voice said. The two spun around to face a short beagle in a black t-shirt, and a tall cat in a black coat, or some kind of suit. They both had a glass of water in each hand.

"Hey," Mordecai smiled.

"Hey," Rigby repeated. "Things are going okay."

"I'm Dudley," said the dog.

"I'm Agent Kitty Katswell," said the cat.

"I'm Mordecai," Mordecai answered as he stood up, "and this is Rigby."

"I can introduce myself, dude," Rigby muttered.

"Care for a cool drink?" Dudley handed out the two glasses to Mordecai and Rigby, who both took it and sipped. Dudley took on of Kitty's next to sip. The water was cool and tasty.

"Mm, thanks," Rigby smiled after he swallowed.

"Just wanted to welcome you to TUFF," Kitty continued.

"Thanks, we sure feel welcome now," Mordecai chuckled, "so, how long have you guys been working here?"

"I've been working for TUFF for at few years now," Kitty answered, "I haven't really been keeping track that much. Dudley here started here early this summer."

"Yep, and now we're a totally awesome team!" Dudley exclaimed. "We're one of TUFF's best teams here! I'm tellin' ya, this place rocks! You guys are gonna love working here!" Dudley said his last sentence in a sly tone, "I know I do!"

"Oh, sure, we'll love working here," Rigby replied, sarcastically, "if in the next ten minutes, we fall in love with paper work!"

"Ha!" Kitty giggled, "your cousin said you had a great sense of humor, Rigby."

"You guys know RJ?"

"Of course we do! We know almost everyone who works here. Well, I do. I think Dudley still has a few people to memorize."

"Yeah, I still don't have _everyone_ down flat yet," Dudley added, "But I got most people here. But anyway, yeah, RJ's a great guy!"

"He sure is," Mordecai said. "I'm so happy he got us in here."

"Yeah. I'm glad I have him for a cousin," Rigby smiled.

Kitty took another sip of her water. "So, where are you guys from?"

"Well, umm, we didn't come that far," Mordecai answered. "We live in the Recx, just the next borough over."

"Woah! The Recx!" Dudley repeated, "that's a long way! It's like an hour-long drive from here to there, isn't it?"

"Yep. But I'd say it was worth it," Rigby answered slyly.

"You guys ever been down here before?" Dudley asked.

"No. Not really. I don't think so."

"Where did you guys work before this, if you don't mind me asking?" Kitty asked.

"We were groundskeepers at the Recx Park," Mordecai answered.

"Woah! How did you guys get from groundskeepers to secret agents? What did Keswick see in you guys that made him think you were experienced enough?"

"Well, in the park, we went on a bunch of crazy adventures, and fought things you wouldn't even believe if we told you," Rigby answered, in a hushed, threatening voice, trying to make it sound dramatic. "We've fought monsters on the moon, video game demons, computerized librarians, wizards, gangster unicorns, wereskunks, the list goes on!"

"And we stopped Snaptrap yesterday from unleashing a cheese monster army!" Mordecai cheered.

"Woah! You guys went up against Snaptrap on your first mission too?" Dudley exclaimed. "So did I!"

"OOOOOHHHH MAAN! Waoowah!" Rigby cheered.

"Yep! Kitty and I have been fighting Snaptrap since I got here. He's one of the most persistent bag guys out there!"

"Well, if he knows what's good for him, he better not pop his ugly rat head out again, or TUFF will be on his tail!" Mordecai smirked.

"Wow, I like these guys already," Dudley said to Kitty.

"And we like you guys already!" said Mordecai. "You guys are awesome. I think we're gonna get along great."

"You know what I think I like most about you guys?" Dudley added. "Is that you guys don't wear clothes at all. I mean look at me, I don't wear pants, but you guys go all the way! You guys are so cool!"

"Heh, my brother Don thought the same thing," Rigby chuckled.

"That's right, 'cause clothes suck!" Mordecai cheered.

"Yeah! No pants!" Dudley yelled.

In a fit of glee, the three of them started dancing together and cheering "_No Pants! No Pants! No Pants!_"

Their cheering was interrupted when a few animal agents poked their heads out from the neighboring cubicles and shushed them.

"What? Aw, come on!" Rigby grunted. "What is with this rule about keeping quiet? What is this place? A freakin' library?"

"I know. It bugs me too sometimes," Dudley rolled his eyes.

Kitty had been watching the whole show, with a look of astonishment, and later one of exhaustion_. Oh, great,_ she thought,_ another couple of screwballs. They'll let anyone be a secret agent these days. Well, I'm sure I'll get use to them eventually. I got use to Dudley, after all._

"Okay. I think I better get back to work," Kitty said out loud. "It was nice meeting you guys." She turned to head back to her cubicle.

"Okay, see ya later," Mordecai waved after her.

"Nice meeting you too," Rigby added.

When she was gone, Dudley spoke up again. "So, you guys are living in the Recx still? Kind of a long route to take every day."

"We got kicked out of our boss's house when we got fired from our old jobs," Rigby answered. "Now we're living with our friend Margaret until we earn enough money to get our own place somewhere."

"You know what? How about this: You guys can come live with me and my mom until you get your own place. We live only like fifteen minutes from here."

"Dude, you still live with your mom?"

"I make enough to move out if I wanted to. I just can't really take care of myself without her."

"Wow, thanks for the offer Dudley," Mordecai said. "Sure. It would be nice if we could come live with you where it's closer. But... um... would your mom be okay with that?"

"Oh, sure! Don't worry about it!" Dudley said confidently. "She's always nice to my friends and coworkers. Or she warms up to them eventually if she doesn't like them at first. But don't worry about it. I'll talk to her about it later."

"Alright, thanks." Mordecai grabbed a pen and a little sticky-note from the small stack that was in the box, and jotted down Margaret's address on it before handing it to Dudley. "Here's Margaret's address. Would you mind picking us up after work today so we can get our stuff from there?"

"Sure. I'll be over at, um, how about... six-thirty?"

"Alright. We'll see ya then," Rigby smiled.

"Later!" And with that, Dudley turned and walked back to his cubicle. When he was gone, Mordecai and Rigby sat down and turned back to the paper work.

"Wow, nice guys," Rigby smiled. "First day on the job and we've already made some new friends!"

"Yeah. And it was cool of Dudley to offer to let us stay with him. Now we have a shorter route to work, and we don't have to keep mooching off of Margaret."

"Heh. I knew she had something to do with that," Rigby smirked.

The two turned back to work. The got done with all the simple paper work in another hour. After that, they took a lunch break, and then finally got some time in the shooting range to practice with their blasters before quitting time at five.

* * *

><p>Later that evening, Mordecai and Rigby were getting their stuff back together in Margaret's apartment. She was standing around with them. They had about five minutes before Dudley came and picked them up.<p>

"I know I said this last night, but I'm so proud of you guys," Margaret said.

"Yeah, we get it," Rigby grunted, earning a light punch in the arm from Mordecai to shut up.

"I have to say I'm pretty impressed too. I mean, you got fired and kicked out of your home with like only ten dollars to spare, and just like that, you guys picked yourselves up and got back on your feet!"

"Well, _you_ were the one who said that when we put our minds to things and work together, we can do just about anything!" Mordecai answered. They all smiled at that for a moment before Mordecai spoke up again. "Hey, again, thanks for letting us stay here. We really appreciate it."

"No problem."

Just then, Mordecai remembered something. He reached into his pocket and took out their key to Margaret's apartment. He held it out to her and said "Here. I don't think we'll be needing this anymore."

"Oh, right okay." Margaret reached over and took the key back, then slipped it into her pocket. "Hey, I know it's going to be a harder commute now, but you guys will still come on up every now and then and see me and Eileen at the coffee shop, right?"

"Oh, absolutely!" Rigby exclaimed.

"Alright good."

That was when there was a knock at the door.

"That's gotta be Dudley," Rigby whispered.

Margaret walked up to the door and opened it. Sure enough, Dudley was there.

"Hey," She smiled at him. "You must be Dudley.

"Yep. And _you_ must be Margaret."

"Yeah. That's me."

Dudley looked over her shoulder to Mordecai and Rigby. "You guys ready to go?"

"Yep!" Mordecai answered. They bags were all packed up. They walked over passed Margaret, and left through the doorway. Before they left, though, Margaret stopped Mordecai for a second.

"Hey, good luck out there!" she whispered, "and be careful." Before Mordecai could say anything else, the robin wrapped her arms around his torso and pulled him into a gentle hug.

Mordecai stood there stupidly for a moment. He managed to snap back to reality for a brief second to hug her back. The hug lasted only about two seconds, but it seemed to go a lot longer than that for Mordecai.

At last she pulled away from him. "Okay, see ya." She smiled and waved good bye.

"Okay, thanks. You too. See ya." Mordecai, still in a daze, managed to turn and walk down the hallway after Rigby and Dudley. Once they were some ways down the hall, Margaret went back inside and shut the door.

"OOOOOHHHH! SSSCOOOOORRRRRRREE!" Rigby cheered.

"What a nice chick," Dudley said with a smile.

"Wow! She _hugged_ me!" Mordecai huffed.

"-_And_ she told you to be careful!" Rigby added. "She's worried about you. She is so _digging_ on you!"

"Come on, dude. It was just one hug and a few words. I don't think she'll ever notice me as more than just a friend."

"Sure she will! She's clearly warming up to you more."

"I'm telling you; next time we see her, she'll have a new boyfriend."

"You know what, whatever, let's forget about it."

They made it out of the apartment building, out to Dudley's car, which was parked lengthwise against the sidewalk.

"Check out my ride, guys," Dudley whispered smoothly. He walked over to the slick-looking white convertible. "The TUFF mobile. Drives as fast as a race car, has a huge array of weapons, transforms into several different other vehicles, and can connect to every known radio station in the area!"

"Woah, you're allowed to drive this thing around off duty?" Mordecai asked.

"Yep! Got a permit for it! It's practically mine, except I don't have to pay the car loan or insurance; TUFF takes care of that!"

"Dude, that's awesome!"

"I know, right. Now hop in, and I'll show ya what this thing can do!"

After Mordecai and Rigby tossed their bags into the trunk, the trio hopped in to the car. Dudley at the wheel, and Mordecai and Rigby in the back. Dudley started up the engine, pulled out via reverse parallel, and then slammed on the gas, jetting them off down the (nearly empty) road toward Petropolis. The three of them cheered and howled with adrenalin.

* * *

><p>Finally, at about seven-fifteen, when the sun had completely and the sky was pitch black, the TUFF mobile came to a screeching halt in front of what must have been Dudley's house in the suburbs of Petropilis. Mordecai and Rigby could not really tell. They were too stoked from the ride to really look at it. Their fur and feathers were all ruffled from the wind, and their eye lids and lips were all peeled back.<p>

"WOAH! DUDE!" Rigby moaned in awe and stupor. "That was totally awesome!" He started patting down his fur to look nicer.

"Yeeeeaaaaahhh!" Mordecai added, "I can't remember the last time I've been on a ride so much fun... or so terrifying!" He started tidying up his feathers too.

"Eh, it was probably the last time we went on a big roller coaster at the fair, whenever that was."

"I don't know about you, but I don't think I've _ever_ been on a roller coaster that went so fast! My freakin' life flashed before my eyes a few times back there!" They unfastened their seat belts, and got out of the car on their respective sides.

"Yep, and I get to ride around like this all the time," Dudley whispered slyly as he got out of his seat.

"Hey, dude, question," Mordecai spoke up, his tone a little more serious. "Is that even safe? I mean how close were we coming to getting into an accident or getting pulled over? I'm pretty sure you went over the speed limit at a few places.

"Ah, I've gotten pulled over a few times, gotten tasered once or twice and put in jail for just a few hours, accidentally knocked a few pedestrians. But overall, everything has turned out okay in the end, and I've never hurt anyone really badly."

"Well, as much fun as that was, you should probably be more careful next time, alright man?"

"Aw, come on, Mordecai!" Dudley rolled his eyes. "You sound _just_ like Kitty! Loosen up and enjoy life a little more whenever you can, will ya?"

"Oh, most of the time, Mordecai's a really cool, fun-loving guy like me," Rigby spoke up. "It's just between the two of us, he's the more mature and responsible one, which really bugs me sometimes."

"Hey, one of us has to be the voice of reason, and it's obviously not going to be you," Mordecai retorted.

"I can be just as responsible as you if I want to!" Rigby snapped.

"Hm, Hm. Yeah. _Sure_ you can."

"Okay, guys." Dudley interrupted. "Don't get mad at each other. We're just going to go in and meet my mom and get settled in. Come on, this is a good night."

Remembering how much of a good time they were all having earlier, and excited about the new roommate situation coming up, the two cheered up and put on happy faces again.

"Now, let's go inside," Dudley smiled and turned toward the door.

Finally calmed down from their adrenalin rush, Mordecai and Rigby got a good look at the house. It was a quaint-looking, purple-painted, two-story little house. There was a tree with a tire swing on one side of it, and a yellow garage to the other side. From the outside, it looked like a cozy little place to live.

They followed Dudley down the path of stepping stones to the front door. For some reason, Dudley ducked down and slid in through the doggy door, and then opened the door from the inside to let in his friends.

"Welcome to Casa de... uh... Puppy Family." Dudley announced softly as Mordecai and Rigby entered the house. The living room seemed pretty nice. There was a smooth wooden floor, yellow painted walls, and a few pictures hung up on them. At the end of the room was a staircase to the second floor, and a room into what must have been the kitchen. There was a lamp and a purple arm chair in one corner close to the door too, and a coat rack on the other side. In the center of the room was a purple carpet in front of a fireplace, across from an upright piano.

"Wow, nice-looking place," Mordecai smiled.

"Thanks. Yep," Dudley answered with pride. "My mom and I have lived here for as long as I can remember."

"Dudley!" A high, scratchy voice called from the upstairs, "Is that you?"

"Yeah, Mom," Dudley called back, "I'm home!"

The source of the voice walked out from one of the doors upstairs. It was an elderly white dog, about as tall as Rigby. She had dark curly hair, some purple-rimmed glasses, and a blue coat over a darker blue dress. Under her arm was a book. She had a look of apathy on her face.

She came downstairs to greet her son and his companions. "So, are these your new friends you told me about?" she asked.

"Yep. Mordecai and Rigby." Dudley smiled and gestured the respective friends next to him.

"Nice to meet you, Mrs. Puppy." Mordecai held down his hand to her. She took it and shook. She had a surprisingly strong grip for someone as old-looking as her. She shook Rigby's hand as well.

"Hi there, boys," She answered. "Now, Dudley says you need a place to stay for a while."

"Yeah, its just until we make enough money to get our own place." Rigby answered.

"Now, thing is I don't plan on lettin' any more of Dudley's free-loadin' friends stay at my house."

"Oh, we're not free-loaders," Mordecai replied defensively.

"No, we still are kinda free-loaders," Rigby retorted right before Mordecai punched him in the arm.

"Okay, look," He continued, "we'll give you some of our payments when we start getting paid, how about that? It'll be like paying rent to you."

"Dudley and I make plenty of money to get by," Peg grunted, "although I guess a little extra money wouldn't hurt. But what I really could use is a few more strong sets of hands and backs to help me with some of the little chores around here. Dudley never does anything." She rolled her eyes at her son briefly before continuing. "So, help me with some of the chores, and pay a small bit of rent to me, and you guys can stay. How about that?"

"Yeah. Sure. Works for us," Mordecai smiled.

"Okay, I guess I can stomach a little extra work," Rigby muttered.

"Excellent. Welcome to our home. I'll get your bed rolls."

* * *

><p>After a minute, Peg and Dudley had gotten the bed rolls from the garage, and had set them down in the corner closest to the kitchen, side by side for the guys. Mordecai and Rigby had also gotten their things from the car and put them down in their spot.<p>

"Okay, now you boys will be sleeping here," She said when the rolls were out. "Now don't worry too much about the chores. It'll mostly be cooking, dishes, laundry, and shopping."

"Oh, don't worry," Mordecai said. "We can do those things."

"That's fantastic! You know, I like you boys. Dudley always picks out such nice friends to hang out with. Okay, I'll let you boys get back to your stuff. I'm going into my room to read my little book here." And with that, Peg turned to head back upstairs to what must have been her room.

"Alright, guys," Dudley said when she was gone. "So, what do you guys wanna..."

_BEEP BEEP BEEP, BEEP, BEEP-BEEP, BEEP, BEEP-BEEP!_ Before he could finish his sentence, there was a loud horn went off from outside the house.

"Yo, Dud! You ready to go?" Shouted a man's voice.

"OOOH!" Dudley squealed with glee as he rushed over to the door. Mordecai and Rigby, surprised and confused, followed him.

Outside, parked right behind Dudley's car, was a new car. A yellow convertible of some sort. In the driver's seat was a chocolate labrador, about as tall as Mordecai, with blond hair that covered his eyes, and a blue t-shirt and beige jeans.

Beside him in the passenger seat sat a bull dog, only up to Dudley's height. He was white with black and brown spots all over his body. He wore a red t-shirt under a brown leather jacket. One thing though that really stood out about him was a grotesque pimple that stood out just on the edge of his cheek, near his nose.

Dudley walked up to these guys and gave them both a fist bump. "Hey, guys!" He exclaimed. "Sorry, I totally forgot about tonight! I got a bit side-tracked." He scratched the back of his head.

"Ah, it's cool, man," Said the lab. "You're not _too_ busy to come out, are ya?"

"Nope, not at all. I'm still up for it!"

"Eh-hm!" Rigby cleared his throat loudly, and a little rudely, to get Dudley's attention. "Dudley, who are these guys?"

"Oh, ha! Right," Dudley giggled nervously. "How stupid of me. Mordecai, Rigby, these are my friends, Roger and Phil." He pointed to the labrador and bulldog respectively. "Roger, Phil, these are my new coworkers, Mordecai and Rigby."

"What are _they_ doing at your house?" the bulldog, Phil asked.

"Oh, they're a little short on cash, and they need a place to stay until they can make enough to get their own place somewhere. So until then, I invited them to come live with me and my mom!"

"Wow! That's pretty cool," Roger nodded.

"So what's going on here?" Mordecai asked. "Did you guys have plans or something."

"Yeah. I forgot all about it," Dudley chuckled again. "We were going to go hang out at our favorite bar for a while." It was then that a new idea sprang into Dudley's head. "You know what? You guys wanna come with us?"

Mordecai smiled at that idea. He remembered the few times he and Rigby had gone to that one bar, _McHooligan's_ was it? with the other groundskeepers, and how much fun they all had. He imagined having a good time like that with Dudley and his friends here, getting to know them more. This was going to be fun.

"Sure. We'd love to!" Rigby answered while Mordecai was thinking it over.

"Is that okay, with you guys?" Dudley asked the other two dogs.

"Sure. I'm cool with it," Phil answered.

"The more bros, the merrier," Roger smiled, "-Long as they don't get the seats messy!"

"Nah!" We'll be careful," Mordecai replied reassuringly.

"Alright then. Cool! Hop in!"

While Mordecai and Rigby opened the door to the back seats and slipped in, with Mordecai taking the window and Rigby in the middle, Dudley ran back to the house door again.

"Mom!" He shouted, "Roger and Phil are here! We're leaving!"

"Alright, you boys have fun, Dudley!" She called back. "Just don't stay out too late! And don't drink too much!"

"I'll be okay, Mom! Thanks!" Dudley shut the door and jumped over back to the seats, on the window seat on the other side of Rigby. He stuck his head over the car door, ready to feel the breeze like dogs like to do on road trips.

"I'm tellin' ya, Dud," Phil groaned, "you're going to catch a fly doing that one of these days."

Everyone got a good laugh out of that. Finally, Roger pulled out from the driveway, and drove off into the city. Needless to say, going 30 miles an hour, the ride was not as fast or thrilling as the ride in the TUFF mobile to Dudley's house, and Mordecai and Rigby were okay with that. They had gotten plenty of thrill from that last ride, and were now ready to settle down, relax, and spend some time with their new friends.

**Author's Comments: I'm SOOO sorry it took so long to update. So many things came up. First I was working on another story, and then I got really busy with school, and then when I finally found time, I came down with a bit of writer's block! And so I resorted to playing a lot of xbox 360 games, which is my equivalent to drinking. So I'm sorry so much go in the way, but I finally got around to this.**

**Okay, I spent a full day working on this chapter. I brought it up from 1,400 words to over 6,600. I'm pretty exhausted now. If it seems a bit rushed at the last couple of parts, starting when they get to Dudley's house, sorry about that. I did the best I could, as best as I could picture it. I hope you like it.**

**You know, on TUFF Puppy, we keep hearing about Roger and Phil. He keeps talking about them, briefly mentioning them, calling them his friends. I had always wanted to see more of them, wanted to see them hang out with Dudley some time, so I decided to use them here.**

**Well, this is all I got for now. I'll be seeing you next time!**


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